


TutorMate

by faeryn



Series: TutorMate [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College, Alternate Universe - Human, Anonymity, Destiel - Freeform, Flirting, Fluff, Frottage, Gender Confusion, Internet, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, Online Relationship, Romantic Comedy, Tutoring, referenced canon character death, sabriel if you squint
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-29
Updated: 2014-03-29
Packaged: 2018-01-17 11:32:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 21,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1386076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/faeryn/pseuds/faeryn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam leaves Dean's laptop logged in to some app called "TutorMate" and Dean meets his brother's tutor. Cas helps him with his own work and they strike up a friendship. Before long Dean finds himself growing attached to the cute, clever Cas and flirtatiously suggests they go on a date if he applies himself to his college work. Cas agrees, but Dean discovers his online friend is not quite what he expected.</p><p>(Or, in which Dean thinks he's met a cute girl and finds out he's actually met a cute boy.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	TutorMate

**Author's Note:**

  * For [cobalt_wings](https://archiveofourown.org/users/cobalt_wings/gifts), [darkbluesharpie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkbluesharpie/gifts).



> This fic is dedicated to two lovely ladies who have shown a lot of support for this story. Without them I probably would never have gotten around to finishing it! <3 Thank you cobalt_wings and darkbluesharpie for your words of encouragement! 
> 
> This ended up being _so much longer_ than it was supposed to be. I wanted to write a one-shot at around 10k words just because splitting things into chapters is hard and tends to draw things out way longer than necessary. This is my result. Bah. I hit 15k thinking "okay, not much more now" and then... yeah. Fuck these two and their cuteness and their issues and their generally being adorable little shits.

“Hey Dean, can I borrow your laptop?” Sam asked from the doorway of Dean’s bedroom.

“Sure,” Dean didn’t look up from the car magazine he was reading, even when Sam crossed the room to pick up the computer and charger. “We need to take yours to the shop?” He finally flicked his eyes up from the article and raised an eyebrow at his brother.

“Nah, I left the charger at the library the other day and haven’t had time to pick it up. I’d go now but I told my friend I’d be on this evening to talk about tomorrow’s test so...”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Dean had already lost interest, “just don’t break it okay?”

“You’re the only one who breaks things,” Sam snorted.

“I always fix ‘em again though,” Dean shot back.

Sam rolled his eyes and left the room, shutting the door behind him.

 

Three days later Dean sat down at his desk with a sigh, plugging in the laptop and waking it from sleep mode. He supposed he’d better finish that essay for his History class sooner or later and, he reasoned, if he got it done before the weekend Sam would have no reason to lecture him about going out to Charlie’s party. He’d just opened the essay and an internet browser when a chat box popped up with a quiet ‘bing’.

_Did you get your result back from the test?_

He read the message, apparently from someone called ‘Cas’ and frowned. Clicking on the app he realised it was something called “TutorMate” his brother must have downloaded. This ‘Cas’ must have been the friend he was talking about speaking to when he borrowed the laptop, Dean figured Sam had forgotten to sign out. Not wanting to be rude he pulled up the chat window again and quickly typed out a reply.

**Hey, sorry I think you’re looking for my brother. Has a habit of leaving himself logged in on my laptop.**

He only had to wait a moment for a reply.

_Hello, Dean. Apologies, Sam did mention he was using your device when we last spoke but I was unaware he had returned it to you._

Dean laughed at the peculiar formality of the response, but then again Sam did have a lot of weird friends.

**No big deal Cas, nice to ‘meet’ you I guess.**

_Nice to ‘meet’ you too, Sam has spoken often of you. He mentioned you are studying European History, correct?_

**Yeah, just about to work on an essay for it actually. Urgh, sometimes it’s a real drag though.**

_What is the subject?_

**This one? Something about the religious conversion of western Europe during the freakin’ year dot. Idk.**

_The Christian conversion?_

**Something like that I guess. You a history buff?**

_Theology major, would you like some assistance?_

**I don’t even know you Cassie and you’re offering to help me out on my essay?**

_Please do not call me Cassie. Cas is sufficient. And yes, that is the purpose of the application. I usually tutor Sam but since he does not currently require my assistance I am free to advise you if you would like._

**Ooh touchy, sorry Cas. D’you always type so formally? I bet you’re a blast at parties.**

**Sorry, that was rude, I’d love some help. This shit pretty much goes over my head, it’s my minor and I only took it ‘cause Sam said we’d get to learn about mythology which is cool. But we only did one semester on mythology and now we’re moving on to actual boring history stuff. Which sucks.**

_You will enjoy the philosophy module, I think, they cover some of the more interesting subjects there also. And in answer to your question; yes, I do always type like this. Thus far nobody has made an objection, is it a problem? I do not attend parties so I would be unwilling to hazard a guess as to whether or not I was a ‘blast’._

**No parties? Shame! That’s what college is for! The only reason I’m working on this essay now is so Sam won’t give me a hard time for going to a party at the weekend :P Nah, not a problem, just weird I guess. Well not weird weird, just unusual, I’ll get used to it.**

_Well at least he is providing you with motivation. Would you be able to e-mail me a copy of the brief, and I will do my best to advise you wherever you require? My address is Angel.of.Thursday[at]_ _gmail.com_

**Not much for small talk, gotcha. Okay, I’ll send it over now. Cute e-mail ;p**

Dean managed to get almost the entire essay completed in just a few hours, with a lot of help from Cas, and finally logged off feeling like he’d actually achieved something instead of his usual hour’s worth of ‘work’ followed by maybe another hour or two of online gaming with Charlie. Before he put the computer away he signed up to the app’s website under his own name and added Cas to his contacts list – with her permission – and logged Sammy out. Not before laughing at his screen name of Sam_the_Moose though, apparently Jo’s nickname for his brother had stuck.

She must be English, Dean decided, because no American he’d met spoke so formally. But she must have been in the US a while since she obviously studied in college over here because she knew _way_ too much about the system and the syllabus otherwise. There was very little left of his essay to do and Cas had told him she was unwilling to help him any further, and in fairness she’d basically written most of it for him, but Dean knew his professor would be pleasantly surprised when he handed the essay in on Monday morning, not begging him for an extension for a change.

 

“Hey Dean,” Sam said one day a week or so later, “Cas wants to know how you scored on your essay. I didn’t know you two were in touch?”

“Oh yeah, you left your thing logged in on my laptop one time and Cas helped me out some. I dunno yet, I haven’t got the grade back. Prof’s a bit of a sloth when it comes to grading,” he grinned up at his brother from where he lounged on the couch watching reruns of Dr Sexy M.D. “Say hi for me.”

Sam gave him an odd look then rolled his eyes and returned to the relative safety of his own room.

**Dean says hi and he hasn’t got his grade back yet. Thanks for helping him out, he won’t ask me and he won’t take my offers either. *sigh* He’s hard work.**

_I can imagine, I have brothers too. I will bother mine into finishing that grading, though I know he has looked at Dean’s. He asked me if I had been tutoring his students again._

**That obvious?**

_I think it was more that Dean does not usually show so much interest in the historical aspect of the course, yet he turned in an essay on time for a change._

**Yeah, that’d do it, Dean usually does half the work to get me off his back then slacks off until the deadline hits and begs for more time.**

_He should take more care, not all professors are as lenient as my brother._

**You try telling him that... Anyway, enough chit chat man, I’ve gotta worry about my own work. If Dean wants to waste his time then that’s his business but I’m not gonna let him waste mine too.**

_Right. Let me know if I can assist you._

**Will do, thanks Cas.**

“You can all thank my kid brother for getting your essays back in double-quick time,” Professor Novak drawled at the beginning of Dean’s next lesson, “he nagged me to finish my grading.”

“Yeah, I hear ya on the naggy little bros,” Dean quipped and the class laughed; Dean’s endless battle with his brother over whether schoolwork or partying were more important was well known.

“They’re a chore, right Deano?” Gabriel shoved the paper under Dean’s nose and grinned. “Good work on this one, you might even pass if you keep this up.” He moved on to the next student but not before he saw Dean’s cheeky smile widen into one of delight as he saw the A circled at the top of his page.

 

Logging on to the app later on his computer Dean was pleased to see the little green icon next to Cas’ name as usual, though he hadn’t actually spoken to her since he’d submitted his essay, too busy enjoying the freedom from homework.

**Woo hoooooooooo**

_Hello Dean, I presume you received your grade today?_

**Hells to the yeah! I got an A! Thanks for all your help, I couldn’t have done it without you.**

_I am certain you could have, you only needed a nudge in the right direction._

**No way, if you hadn’t explained it all to me I’d have still been sitting here staring at a blank page. Prof said if I keep it up I might actually pass. Not that that was a worry, I was always gonna pass, but I think he was happy I actually got a grade above a D for once haha.**

_You usually get a D? How is that even possible?_

**By being dumb as shit. Oops, sorry, I mean dumb as, uh... a really dumb thing. Idk I don’t really get all this academic stuff. My major is auto repair lol so not a lot of essays needed there.**

_Dean. You are very intelligent. The questions you ask are astute and I never had to explain anything more than once to you. I would hazard that you are at least as intelligent as your brother._

**Aw Cas, I’m blushing ;)**

_You are incorrigible._

**I’m adorable.**

_I will have to take your word for that. Anyway, I am glad my assistance has been of use to you. Of course, if you require any further help I will be here._

Dean hesitated before replying, tapping his fingers on the keyboard lightly as he thought. Cas had been a huge help to him with that essay, but she just seemed so uptight all the time. Maybe he could loosen her up a little, she had never been offline when he’d logged on to the app so maybe she just didn’t have many friends?

**We could just chat for a bit, if you like. I’ve got no more essays due right now (I think prof is planning one though, he gets this crafty look when he’s gearing up to whip us with something) but I can always use some good company :)**

_None of my other contacts are online at the moment so I suppose I have some time. What would you like to talk about Dean?_

Dean hadn’t really thought that far ahead so he hesitated again, frowning at the laptop like it had offended him.

**I dunno, whatever you like. What d’you do apart from tutor people?**

_Study, jogging, I play guitar some too._

**Guitar? That’s cool! I wanted to be a rockstar when I was a kid lol :P**

_I play at church so most of the songs I know are hymns, my brother tells me I should learn some more popular songs but I see no purpose to that. I only started learning because our former guitarist was talking about retiring and there was nobody to replace her._

**...**

**You learned guitar to take over from someone retiring? Not for fun?**

_It is fun, Dean. I enjoy playing at church, the hymns are very soothing._

**Tell me you like real music too!?**

_What do you mean by “real” music?_

**You know! Rock and roll! Zeppelin! AC/DC! Metallica!**

_My ex liked AC/DC, I think I still have one of his shirts lying around here somewhere... But he never played any for me._

**Sounds like a dick t’me. Here, I’ll send you some music, your homework is to listen to them and let me know what you think okay? ;)**

_Whatever you say, Dean._

Dean quickly compiled a playlist from his favorite music folder, deliberately choosing a diverse spread of songs for Cas to listen to – girls tended to steer clear of the ‘heavier’ end of his taste in music. It ended up taking way longer than he expected and before Dean knew it he was yawning.

**Okay, I’m sending you the playlist now and then I gotta get to bed. I have an early lecture tomorrow, urgh. Why do they have to schedule them at these unholy hours of the morning??? D:**

_Because unlike the students the teachers often work all day and have to have time to grade and be available to students requiring assistance?_

**Cas, did you just sarcasm me???**

_I am sure I have no idea what you are talking about._

**You sly... Alright I really have to go, talk to you soon Cas :)**

_Sleep well, Dean._

“You’re unusually cheerful this morning,” Sam said warily as Dean whistled brightly over the bacon he was cooking for their breakfast. Their little two-bed apartment wasn’t far from campus so they never had to get up _too_ early, but it was still unusual for Dean to be this happy at 8 in the morning.

“What can I say Sammy? I’m furthering the musical education of a cute girl, got an A on my essay and we’ve got bacon a-plenty. What’s to complain about?” Dean grinned and poked at the bacon in the pan to stop it sticking.

“Oh god, what poor girl are you hounding about music now?” Sam helped himself to coffee from the pot already brewed and took a seat at the table. “Not that I’m complaining if it means coffee and breakfast before I get up,” he chuckled.

“Not hounding anyone, just returning a favor,” Dean tipped the bacon out onto two plates and handed one to Sam as he joined his brother at the table.

“Wait, are you educating _Cas_?” Sam spluttered.

“Well I couldn’t’ve got an A on that essay without Cassie’s help so...” his brother’s face took on a suggestive look and Sam nearly spat his coffee across the table.

“How d’you know Cas is a cute girl?” His curiosity got the better of him, this was _beautiful_. Sam and Cas got together for coffee occasionally so he knew full well how wrong Dean was about his tutor but Sam would be damned if he was going to spoil this fun.

“Well I figure she’s English, all that formal speech y’know? And that’s pretty cute. She seems shy, and shy chicks are always cute. And she mentioned an ex-boyfriend left his AC/DC tee at her place, so definitely a girl even though she hates to be called Cassie.”

Sam spluttered again; Cas – Castiel – hated the nickname Cassie because that’s what Gabriel called him and it annoyed the hell out of the guy. The ex-boyfriend was a bit of new information, though, and Sam filed that away to ask Cas about later on.

“Well, good luck, I’d warn you about the dangers of flirting with internet strangers but I think you can take care of yourself.”

“Plus I got a giant moose of a kid brother to look out for me,” Dean winked, shovelling the last of his bacon into his mouth and washing it down with the dregs of his coffee. “I gotta run, Novak’s lecture’s early today, the bastard, see ya later Sammy!”

Sam watched his brother flee the apartment, just barely managing to remember his backpack, with a look of barely restrained amusement. Oh, this was going to be _very_ interesting.

 

_Hello, Dean._

**Hey Cas, how’s it hanging?**

_How is what hanging?_

**... It, Cas, it. Life in general. How are you?**

_I am fine. I enjoyed the music you sent me, thank you. I particularly liked the one titled Spirit in the Sky._

**Yeah, I figured since you go to church and stuff you’d like that one. Surprised you haven’t seen Michael though?**

_I see Michael every week?_

**That’s pretty frequent to watch a movie, Cas, so I’m guessing we’re not talking about the same Michael.**

_You were referring to a movie?_

**Yeah, you weren’t?**

_One of my brothers is called Michael, we see each other at church every week._

**Ahhh that makes sense. You should rent the movie sometime, it’s pretty good.**

_Perhaps I will. How are you?_

**I’m fine, prof gave us another essay to do today so I’m just puzzling over that. Pain in the ass tbh.**

_What is the subject of this one?_

**Idk religious metaphors in art or some shit.**

_I have been meaning to ask you, what do “tbh” and “idk” mean?_

**To be honest; I don’t know.**

_Oh. Then why do you use them?_

**...Cas you are adorable. TBH means “to be honest” and IDK means “I don’t know”. That was cute though.**

_Oh. I understand._

**There’s an awful lot of religion in this history class >:[ Hmpf. Not that I mind too much, gives me an excuse to talk to you ;)**

_Yes, European history is tied very closely to religion. We had to study it extensively for my Theology class too. Apparently the Europeans are incapable of going more than a few years without some sort of religious war or crusade. It’s very tiresome._

**Did you just use a contraction???**

_I am perfectly capable of using contractions, I just choose not to most of the time._

**Haha wow, okay.**

_So are we going to get started on this essay or not?_

**Aw I dunno Cas, I feel bad for bugging you for help again.**

_That is what the application is for, Dean._

**Yeah but I like your company too, you know that right?**

_Please hold on a moment, Sam wants to talk to me._

**Okay....**

_Hello Sam_

Hey Cas, are you okay?

_Of course, should I not be?_

No, no, of course not. Just... I know you don’t always pick up on these things so I thought I’d better warn you. My brother’s flirting with you.

_I... see? Why?_

He thinks you’re cute.

_I am not cute._

He doesn’t know that :P Just giving you a head’s up anyway.

_Thank you, Sam._

_Apologies for the interruption._

**Can’t focus on more than one conversation at once, hey Cas?**

_I can when it is necessary but I prefer to avoid it where possible._

**Fair enough :)**

_I will send you a list of artworks you should focus on for your essay. They all depict the archangel Gabriel, would you agree your professor would appreciate that?_

**Vain bastard, I bet he would. Probably set the assignment just for that reason. Bleh. Okay, thanks for the help Cas :) Dunno what I’d do without ya.**

_You could always ask Sam._

**Nah, he’s got his own work to do without dealing with mine too.**

_So do I?_

**Ouch :( Sorry Cas, I won’t bother you anymore. Thanks for your help buddy.**

_That’s not what I meant Dean, as well you know. I mean he is more than willing to help you if you need it._

**Sure**

_Do not sulk Dean! >:[_

Dean’s face went red and he gave a low chuckle, tapping his fingers on his desk as he tried to think of a way to pull this back. He was being a bit childish, he supposed.

**Alright, sorry. Cute face, I bet you’re adorable when you’re mad.**

_I am not ‘cute’ or ‘adorable’ at any time._

**You’re cute and adorable all the time.**

_I am not._

**Are too.**

_I am not!_

**You are too :p**

_Do your essay, Dean._

**Okay cutie, but only because you asked so nicely ;)**

_*sigh*_

Dean chuckled at the screen and checked his e-mails. True to her word Cas had sent him a list of relevant artworks for him to research and include in his essay and so Dean got started, resisting the strong urge to keep teasing her.

 

“Dean, are you turning in _another_ essay on time?” Gabriel’s face was one of mock horror. “Don’t tell me you’re going to become a good student all of a sudden,” his eyes twinkled mischievously.

“Well it’s sure got nothing to do with your teaching skills,” Dean shot back, handing over the thin sheaf of paper with a cocky smile. “I think you’ll like this one, Prof, it’s got your name written all over it.”

It had taken Dean two weeks and a lot of help from Cas to put together the essay, and in truth he hadn’t totally hated doing the work. Sure Charlie had nagged him about not being available for gaming for a while and Sam had teased him incessantly about spending so much time at his desk but if Dean was truthful with himself he had actually _enjoyed_ getting an A. Maybe he wouldn’t quite become a _good_ student, but he definitely felt for the first time that it was probably worth making a bit more effort in his class. Life wasn’t all carburettors and tailpipes, after all. It had absolutely nothing to do with getting the chance to talk more with Cas, nope not at all.

Yet somehow that evening he found himself lounging on his bed with his laptop, he had no more homework for the time being and so technically he should have been out partying with Jo, Charlie and Benny, but he was sitting here instead, firing up the TutorMate app and tapping his fingers impatiently on the trackpad as it slowly booted. Perhaps he should consider getting a new laptop, one that wasn’t so painfully slow. Finally the startup jingle sounded and he let out an impatient huff of relief.

“Fucking finally,” he grumbled under his breath.

**Hey Cas, how ya doing?**

_I am well, as always. I thought you had completed your essay?_

**Yeah, prof was surprised again. Gotta say, I might have to finish all my homework on time just to keep him on his toes lol.**

_Well whatever your motivation that would be a good thing. I know Sam would be happy also._

**Yeah, yeah. Sammy’s happy so long as I’m being as boring as him ;) What’re you up to?**

_Restringing my guitar, I managed to snap my G string yesterday so I had to buy a new set today._

**... AHAHAHAHA Cas omg XD pmsl.**

_I do not understand your initialisms, Dean._

**Oh my god, pissing myself laughing. (that’s omg and pmsl...)**

_What is funny?_

**Cas you know what a g-string is right?**

_Of course I do, I would have a hard time playing without one, Dean._

**Oh man you are too funny. It’s a, y’know, article of underwear. Like a thong but... uh... stringier.**

_I see._

**How d’you not know what a g-string is, how sheltered are you?**

_Well I don’t wear them, Dean, and it is not like any of my exes have exactly been the type to do so either._

**Okay, okay, fair enough I guess :P**

_So, was there something you needed help with?_

**Nah, just bored, thought I’d hit you up for some entertainment. As always, not disappointed. ;) You’re adorable, y’know?**

_I am not._

**Don’t start that again! Okay, okay, you’re not adorable. You’re the opposite of adorable.**

_Right. Do you not have some work to do, Dean?_

**Nope! Don’t you have some play to do, Cas?**

_Yes, I have to practice as soon as I finish tuning._

**I mean fun Cas! Don’t you ever have fun?**

_Playing guitar is fun._

**Jeez louise. Okay. Here’s the deal. If I turn in my essays on time for the rest of the semester you go to a party, capiche?**

_I am really not the “party” sort, Dean. And just because it is your kind of fun does not mean it will be my kind of fun._

**Everyone likes parties Cas, and how do you meet cute boys if you never go to parties???**

_Usually they ask me for help with their essays online._

Well, it couldn’t get more pointed than that and Dean blushed to the very tips of his ears, glad there was nobody around to see him. He’d been dancing around the flirtations for a few days now, well maybe a couple of weeks if he was truly honest, but the fact was that he genuinely did like Cas. She was sweet and helpful and always made him feel smart even though he knew he was quite dull compared to her and Sammy.

**Touché. Okay, how’s this. If I hand in all my essays on time go on a date with me?**

Dean looked at the words he’d just sent in horror then buried his face in his hands. He did _not_ date. He could count on one hand the number of girls he’d taken on dates. Still... he could also count on one hand the number of girls he’d talked to for more than a couple of hours before asking them out, too. Cas was... different somehow. The damage was done, though, he couldn’t take it back now.

_I doubt you will still want to in six weeks’ time, ask me again when you have handed in all your essays and perhaps I will consider it._

**Playing hard to get, Cas? ;)**

_No; being realistic. I believe you are intrigued by me but I assure you that interest will wane. If anything I am relieved that you have proposed a date so far away, it gives you plenty of time to change your mind._

**Wow, low self-esteem much? :(**

_Again, simply realism. I would much prefer to take an objective view and be prepared for rejection than get caught up in anticipation and be ultimately disappointed._

**That’s a very clinical way to look at dating, Cas.**

_Perhaps it is. Still, it works for me._

**You’re still single though, right?**

_Yes, but I have not been disappointed in years._

**Wow :( Not sure what to say to that tbh.**

Dean felt a wave of sadness and sympathy for Cas. She talked like someone who had experienced heartbreak, something Dean couldn’t imagine. One of the reasons he didn’t usually date was his very, very secret fear of losing someone he loved again. He’d already lost both his parents, he didn’t want to feel that pain of loss again.

_You do not need to say anything. Shall we move on? Since you are determined to ‘chat’ why don’t you tell me about yourself some? Sam says you’re a few years older than him, yet you are the same year in college, do you mind if I ask why?_

It was a touchy subject, Dean wasn’t surprised Sammy hadn’t told Cas the reason behind it but he was surprised Sam had mentioned it at all. Maybe Cas had been asking about his age since she was obviously a few years above them, academically speaking; perhaps she was interested after all and didn’t want to end up dating a guy too many years younger? Dean floundered for a while, trying to think up a bunch of excuses for his late application but eventually decided on the truth.

**I waited to apply ‘till Sammy was old enough, that’s all. Our mom died when I was four and our dad when I was seventeen. I pretty much raised him since then and I didn’t want him going off to college on his own. He’s my kid brother, y’know?**

_I understand. I am sorry to hear about your parents, but Sam has turned out to be a remarkable young man. You should be proud of yourself for raising him so well._

**It was only five years >.<**

Dean was blushing again, what was _wrong_ with him? How did Cas manage to make him feel like a thirteen year old with his first crush?

_Even still, you could have left him in care and considered yourself first but instead you waited so you would both have the same opportunities in life and so he would not spend the last few years of his childhood without his family. It is admirable of you._

**Jeez Cas you tryina make me combust over here? Shut up already >:[**

Dean felt hot all over and he flopped back on the bed with a groan. Cas wasn’t the first person to say things like that to him, Jo had sobbed when he told her and Charlie had basically said almost exactly the same thing. But they were like his _sisters_ , it wasn’t the same somehow.

_Apologies, Dean. I just do not know many people who would do the same in your position. I will not mention it again. What made you choose auto repair as your major?_

**Ehh... my dad was a mechanic so I already pretty much know how to do everything. I rebuilt my car from the ground up a few years back too** he neatly side-stepped the fact that it was the crash his father had died in that basically totalled his car **so I figured it would be an easy career to choose and something I could breeze through. I wasn’t wrong either, it’s so easy it’s actually a bit sad how far ahead of the others I am.**

_Do you enjoy it?_

**Yeah, I love being around cars all the time and Sammy’s gonna be a kick-ass lawyer so one of us has to stick to our roots :P**

_I think it is wise to choose something you love. I am sorry to cut our conversation short but my brother is calling me, I have to go._

**Yeah, alright, no worries. Talk soon, Cas?**

_I would like that._

Dean shut the laptop a little more vigorously than usual and pushed it away across the bed, lying back and covering his face with his hands. His heart was beating too fast, he had no idea what was wrong with him, he never got this flustered over a girl. He just couldn’t pinpoint what was wrong with him, what made Cas different. Dean flipped over and groaned into his pillow, annoyed with himself for his reversion to a thirteen year old boy.

 

“What is _up_ with you lately, Dean?” Sam asked him a week later as they ate dinner. Dean had done actual grocery shopping and had hand-made burgers – his specialty – and even included salad and _everything_. Sam was weirded out.

“Nothing, what’s wrong with wanting to treat my kid brother once in a while?” Dean grinned around a mouthful of burger, his smothered with bacon, cheese and fried onions as well as the salad he’d put on Sam’s.

“Does this have anything to do with Cas?” Sam asked and Dean choked on his mouthful, his ears turning bright red as he tried to cough up the food lodged in his throat. “So it _is_ Cas.”

“No! Don’t be stupid.” Dean glared at him, finally managing to get his coughing under control but Sam was wise to his antics.

“I know you two talk almost every day, Dean. And since you started ‘studying’ together you’ve been, well... happier.” Sam was torn. He knew Dean thought Cas was a girl and at first it had been funny watching him flirt unknowingly with a guy. Sam had a bit of apprehension when Dean had mentioned an ex-boyfriend – he hadn’t actually known Cas liked guys and figured Cas would correct Dean when he found out Dean was flirting with him. But even though Sam had told him outright Dean was flirting with him it hadn’t stopped and now Dean was _happy_ and everything was going horribly, terribly wrong. But that was the problem. He hadn’t seen Dean this happy since they both got accepted to the same college and he didn’t want to be the one to bring him down by telling him the ‘girl’ he was so happy to talk to was actually a guy.

“I said don’t be stupid Sammy,” Dean growled, breaking him from his thoughts, “Cas has nothing to do with it. I can be happy sometimes, can’t I?”

“Right, sorry,” Sam mumbled, attacking his burger enthusiastically to prevent having to say anything else. He glanced up at Dean and almost choked himself at the strangely soft expression that had come over his brother’s face. Yep, things had _definitely_ gotten out of hand.

 

“Gabriel,” Sam hissed, poking his head around the door frame of the professor’s classroom then ducking inside and shutting the door behind himself as he crossed the room quickly, his extra-long legs covering the distance in a few strides. “Dude, we have a problem.”

“You’re telling me, mooseling,” Gabriel looked up at him, mischief in his eyes, “Cassie’s been mooning over that laptop for _days_.”

“Shit. Gabe, Dean’s gonna freak when he finds out Cas is your kid brother. Your kid brother who is two years his senior. Your kid brother _who is definitely not a girl._ ”

“Relax Sammy, I’ll sort it all out, don’t you worry.”

Sam huffed a breath and raised an eyebrow at Gabriel. “You aren’t even a little bit worried about Cas getting hurt?”

“Cas is a big boy, he can take care of himself.” Sam looked unconvinced. “ _Relax_. I promise I’ll take care of it.”

The door swung open then and Gabriel’s class began to file in. Dean entered with the throng, talking animatedly to one of his classmates until he nudged him and pointed at Sam, saying something Sam assumed was ‘isn’t that your brother?’ There was definitely no escaping now as Dean had spotted him and was walking over with a slight worried frown.

“Hey Sammy, what’re you doing here?”

“None of your business, Deano,” Gabriel piped up before Sam could answer, waggling his eyebrows suggestively, “you’ll find out soon enough anyway.” This time he winked and Sam groaned, realising Gabe was trying to imply they had something planned, which they sort-of did anyway, that Dean wouldn’t like.

“Yeah, sure... I’ll get it out of one of you sooner or later,” Dean frowned again but took his seat at Gabriel’s pointed glance.

 

**Urgh, my brother’s driving me crazy.**

_I know the feeling; mine is always infuriating but he seems to be particularly obnoxious of late._

**Brothers, hey? Can’t live with ‘em, can’t kill ‘em ;)**

_Dean! That’s a horrible thing to say!_

**Woah Cas, calm down, it’s a joke. I would never hurt Sammy, you know that.**

_Well yes, I suppose I do. But even still. Why is Sam being particularly annoying at the moment?_

**It’s not even important, he’s just teasing me. I guess I deserve it, I tease him all the time so he should get chance to get his own back once in a while.**

_I know how you feel, my brother is exactly the same. He thinks just because he is slightly older than me he gets to pick on me and it is... extremely irritating._

**Maybe I should swing by, give him a bit of an older brother heart-to-heart. The old, knight in shining armor schtick.**

_Hmm... as much as I would enjoy seeing him taken down a peg or two I suspect he would only find that funnier. I can deal with him, don’t worry._

**If you say so Cas, but if he gets too much for ya just say the word, ok? :)**

_Thank you Dean, I’ve dealt with him for twenty-four years I can handle it._

**Ooh gave away your age there Cas ;)**

_It’s hardly a secret. You are twenty-two. Sam is eighteen. My brother has a crush on him, by the way._

**WHAT?! Your brother knows Sammy? And has a crush on him? That’s hilarious, I’m telling him.**

_No, please don’t. He will be furious I told you, but you have been so forthcoming with information I thought you deserved a little reciprocation._

Dean tried to ignore the buzzing thrill that ran through him at the word ‘reciprocation’ and huffed an annoyed breath half at himself and half at the computer in front of him.

**Cute, thanks ;) I won’t say anything. How does your brother know Sam anyway?**

_I can’t say, I promised him I would not._

**Fair enough, I’d be pissed if Sam broke a promise like that so I guess I understand. You know, you use more contractions now than you used to.**

_You type very quickly, Dean, I find myself altering the way I type in an attempt to keep up._

**I’m flattered ;)**

_Don’t be. How is class?_

**Uuuuuuurgh. Don’t get me started. Prof pulled me aside the other day and started asking me all these weird-ass questions. He was talking to Sammy just before so I dunno what he’s been saying but he was acting really strange. Actually, now you said your brother has a crush on him... I can’t believe I didn’t realise sooner! I’m so stupid.**

_What?_

**I think Sam might be gay? I think that might be what prof was driving at. He was going on and on about shit like ‘what if someone wasn’t what you thought they were but you really cared about them, would you still care about them?’ and stuff. I guess Sammy must have told him something? What d’you think Cas?**

_I confess I am a little confused. Still, what is between you and Sam is between the two of you and certainly none of my business._

**Fair enough, I guess. How’s theology treatin’ ya?**

_Frustratingly. I can recite a painful number of facts and yet the subject for my dissertation is eluding me. I am sure I will come up with something but time is wearing on and I need to submit my outline soon._

**Maybe if you spent a bit less time helping others and a bit more thinking about it you might come up with it???**

_Perhaps. It will come to me I am sure._

Dean yawned and stretched out on his bed. He needed to go to sleep, he knew, but he really didn’t want to cut the conversation short. Instead, he settled on his front with his hands extended in front of him and his chin propped up on his pillow.

**Well if I can help in any way lmk, it’s the least I owe you for helping me with all these essays. Only two weeks till the end of the semester, btw ;)**

_I do not understand that shorthand either, Dean. It is very exasperating._

**Sorry. LMK = let me know and BTW = by the way.**

_Ah, I see. You use more initialisms than anyone else I know, Dean._

**And you use less contractions than anyone else I know, Cassandra ;p**

_Dean. I have asked you not to call me things like that. Please refrain or I feel it will irreparably damage our relationship._

**Alright, jeez, you’re damn touchy about your name you know that?**

There was that hot feeling again, Dean was blushing furiously and he dropped his head to the pillow until it passed.

 

Dean woke to Sam banging on his door and checked the time groggily – 8:30.

“Dean! I made coffee, I know you don’t have class till later but I figured I’d wake you anyway. I’m going to class, see you tonight!”

“’kay Sammy!” Dean shouted back, looking at the computer screen in front of him in confusion. He realised he must have dozed off last night and left the machine open. Quickly he scanned the conversation in front of him, dominated by Cas’ neat italics.

_Yes, I am. We all have personality quirks, Dean. I dislike my name being feminized, please respect that._

_Are you sulking? I did not think I was being unreasonable._

_Dean do not be childish._

_*sigh*_

_Fine. If it means that much to you I will permit you to call me Cassie. If you absolutely must. I hate it but I am willing to make an exception, my brothers do anyway against my will so at least that one I am used to._

_Dean._

The timestamp showed a long pause before Cas sent another message.

_I just looked at the time and have realised you probably fell asleep with your laptop open. Please disregard my previous messages. Sleep well, Dean._

_[Cas logged out 01:14]_

_[Cas logged in 07:28]_

Dean re-read the messages again and couldn’t help a smile forming on his face. She thought he was sulking, not talking to her out of pettiness, and instead of getting pissy she had backed down! Dean was trying not to read into it too much but it was hard not to think about the fact that she was making an exception for him, as if the use of an unwanted nickname was less abhorrent than not speaking to him anymore.

**Hey Caaaaaaassie, did you really only get 6 hours sleep?**

_Damn it. Hello, Dean, yes I do not usually get much more than 6 hours. I had hoped you would not read the rest of those messages._

**Sorry, I’m just messing with ya, I get that you hate it so I won’t do it again. I couldn’t resist teasing though, I’m an older brother too y’know ;)**

_I am all too aware of this. Sam tells me often about your ‘prank wars’, did he really superglue your hand to a beer bottle?_

**He did, the jerk, but I got him back. We cool?**

_Actually I am rather warm, the air conditioning in my apartment is ‘on the fritz’ as my brother would say._

**... Cas you’re killin’ me with the cute here. I mean are we good, still buddies, you know?**

_Oh. Yes, we are good. Thank you for understanding._

**Thanks for not getting mad I feel asleep on ya :P**

_That is quite alright, I admit I was quite alarmed when I thought you were angry at me but I am relieved it was something more innocuous._

**Aww Cas, quit it with the chick flick moments already, it’d have to be something pretty drastic for me to stop talking to you**

_Thank you, Dean_

**Shucks. Alright, I gotta get up and tidy up the apartment, it’s my turn –siiiiigh- but I’ll talk to you later maybe?**

_I would like that, have a good day, Dean._

“So get this,” Sam said without preamble, dropping his bag into one vacant chair at the table and folding his unnaturally large body into another, “my emotionally constipated older brother, Dean, has a huge crush on you.”

Castiel blinked owlishly at him over his coffee cup, still suffering from the poor night’s sleep. “O...kay?” he rumbled then rubbed his hand over his chin, stubble already starting to peek through even though he’d shaved just that morning and it was barely 2pm.

“The problem, Cas, is he thinks you’re a girl.”

“Why does he think that?” Cas frowned for a second and then raised his eyebrows in understanding, “although that would explain why he likes to feminize my name and why he thinks Gabriel is trying to hint at him that you are gay.”

Sam spluttered, just managing to avoid spraying Castiel’s books with coffee foam, “why the hell does he think I’m... oh never mind, that’s not important. Look, okay, at first I thought it was funny not to tell him cause I figured he’d get bored of online flirting quickly and either ask to meet you or drift away. If you guys met he’d get all embarrassed and I could tease him for ages. If he drifted away, no harm done, right? At the time I did _not_ realise you, uh... you know...”

Castiel looked at him in confusion, brow furrowed slightly and head tilted to one side. “I what?”

“Well, Dean mentioned an ex-boyfriend...”

“Oh, I understand, you were unaware of my sexuality.”

“Yeah,” Sam was going red now, he wasn’t used to having this kind of conversation and Cas was so... unashamedly honest. As if it didn’t even occur to him to lie or dance around a subject. Wholly the opposite of the Winchester boys, who were practically incapable of expressing their emotions so directly. “Anyway, he was already pretty far gone when I realised there was another side of this whole thing to consider, vis-a-vis your feelings and... Cas, you gotta understand that Dean... he’s pretty, uh... well he’s emotionally constipated like I said. I’ve not seen him this relaxed in _years_. And I just...” Sam ran his fingers nervously through his hair and fiddled with his coffee cup, resolutely not meeting Castiel’s unwavering stare. “I didn’t want to be the one to take that happiness away. I talked to Gabe and he said he’d deal with it but that was ages ago and Dean’s still _humming._ So I figured I’d better come clean, I don’t know how you feel about him but... he’s not gay, Cas. I think... I dunno, there was a time a little while back I thought... but after dad... argh I don’t know what to say, I just wanted you to know, that’s all. You’re a great guy, Cas, I don’t want you to get hurt. And I don’t know what to say to Dean.”

Sam fell silent and drank some of his coffee while Cas looked down at his own drink pensively. After a while he lifted the cup to his lips and took a long sip, replacing it on the saucer moments later and swiping his tongue across the froth left on his upper lip. “Thank you for telling me Sam, I will deal with it. So, how are your studies?”

Sam stared at him in disbelief, expecting... he wasn’t entirely sure, but not what he got. “You’re not angry? Or, you know, upset?”

“Should I be? I know you and Dean have a long history of pranking one another and I am not stupid enough to form an emotional attachment to a username,” his eyes flicked away from Sam for a heartbeat and the younger guy thought that maybe that wasn’t _entirely_ true, “but I do appreciate you telling me. You do not need to speak to Dean, in fact I think it best if you allow me to handle the matter entirely. Let him continue in his blissful ignorance for the time being, agreed?”

“Will you be mad if I don’t agree?”

“Possibly,” those blue eyes flashed with something Sam could have sworn was amusement.

“Then agreed, I won’t say a thing.”

 

_Sam thinks you have a crush on me_

**Uh.....**

_Dean?_

**When did you get chance to talk to Sam, his laptop’s been here all day?**

_We meet once a month for coffee, he told me this afternoon._

**You’re kidding! He could’ve said something, the little...**

_Dean, you are avoiding the subject._

**Dammit. Uh. What d’you want me to say, Cas? I like talking to you, I guess –shrug- I dunno, maybe I like you a bit.**

**You’re different. A little bit weird, but not in a bad way. And cute. And you deny it, which is cuter.**

**Urgh why did I send that?**

_Now who is being adorable? You are very sweet when you are flustered. And I am still not cute, not in the least._

**Shut up! You are too.**

_You should ask Sam if I am cute. He will agree with me I am sure. He must be home by now, go on, I will wait._

**You’re an ass. Wait here.**

Dean got up from the desk and stalked across the room, throwing open the door and yelling his brother’s name.

“Dean?” Sam poked his head out of his bedroom.

“You told Cas I have a crush on her?!”

Sam stepped slowly into the doorway, the door open behind him so he could bolt back into the room if necessary. “Yeeeees...”

Dean looked annoyed but mostly embarrassed. “Great, thanks Sammy. Just great. You guys get coffee together once a month and you never told me? Thanks buddy, way to do your brother a solid. Is she cute?”

Sam looked at Dean, considering what to say. Cas had told him to let him handle it, outright telling him he didn’t want Sam to correct Dean’s assumption so... “In an unconventional way I guess. Dark hair. Pretty tanned. Bluest eyes you ever saw, and I’m not kidding there. Heck even I- uh. I mean. You know when poets and stuff write shit like ‘eyes like sapphire pools you could drown in’? Pretty much describes Cas.”

“But cute, right?”

“Yes Dean, I guess you could call Cas cute. Not really my taste but,” Sam shrugged in defeat even as Dean’s face took on a triumphant grin.

“Thanks Sammy!” He bolted back into his bedroom and Sam rolled his eyes, wondering if he’d just made things worse for Cas.

**HA! Sam said you’re cute.**

_I strongly doubt that._

**Ask him yourself, he said you’re cute!**

_What were his exact words, Dean?_

**Well okay, he said in an unconventional way, but still!**

_Damn. He was supposed to agree with me. What on earth possessed him to say that? I will have to have a conversation with him about this later._

**Hahaha I win, boom!**

_Oh, I am not so sure about that. You are the one with the ‘massive crush’, after all._

Dean had been laughing quietly at his victory but now his face fell and became almost thunderous.

 **Ouch.** He was going to say more but he couldn’t think of anything that didn’t sound petty or mean.

_Oh! No. Shit, I apologize. That came out poorly. I was trying to tease you. I am not very good at this._

**You swore D:**

_You swear all the time. And, for some reason, often apologize afterwards? Which I still do not understand._

**Yeah but you never swear!**

_Choose not to, not can’t <\- contractions, remember? Sometimes a situation calls for profanity. I did not wish to imply that I am not fond of you Dean, I am very fond of you. I like our conversations very much._

**Wow, who even says fond anymore?**

_I do?_

**True. And you’re unlike anyone else I ever met.**

_You have no idea._

**What’s that supposed to mean?**

_I just think that you will be very surprised if we end up on that date, Dean._

**Not gonna happen. Dark hair, tanned, bluest eyes Sam’s ever seen? It’s gonna be pretty hard to surprise me so long as Sam’s not lying.**

_He said that?_

**Yeah, he even specified the kind of blue poets write about ;)**

_Wow. What I mean is, I am well aware that my eyes are an unusual shade, I am simply surprised Sam would describe them so._

**Well if you wanted him to put me off he did a shitty job of it**

_Evidently. Even so, I do believe I will have the upper hand if we meet._

**Aw Cas don’t be like that!**

_I am merely being honest. What did your professor ask you? “What if someone was not entirely what they seem” Or words to that effect?_

**Jeez Cas, you’re scaring me now.**

_I apologize, that was not my intention. I am attempting to be coy and mysterious, my brother has assured me it is an effective flirtation tool. I have clearly been misled._

**You’re trying to flirt with me?**

_Apologies._

**Don’t apologize! Just don’t take advice from your brother, okay?**

_Agreed, I am not sure he is as reliable as he claims to be._

**Uh, no, older brothers? Generally not, Cas.**

_You would think I had learned that, having four._

**Four? Wow, that must suck. I only have one kid brother and that’s enough for me, thanks.**

_Well, I am used to them. And speaking of which it seems it is time for dinner._

**Okay, and hey – I’ve only got one more assignment this semester and I handed all the rest in on time ;) Think about where you wanna go on our date, k? :P**

_Certainly, Dean._

“What’s up bitches?” Charlie trilled as she sauntered into the apartment, dumping a duffel bag by the couch and throwing her arms around Dean in a hug.

“Hey Charlie, how’ve you been?” He hugged her back and dropped a light kiss in her hair out of habit before she drew away and glared hard at him.

“Lonely, raiding with randomers,” she grumbled, “you’ve been neglecting me!”

“Aw Charl, don’t be like that, I’ve been busy,” Dean gave her his best impression of Sam’s puppy eyes but she wasn’t fooled for a minute.

“Yeah, Sam’s told me all about your little crush so you can drop the act.” Charlie threw herself down on the couch and waved a hand at him, a gesture he knew meant she wanted him to get her a drink. Dean rolled his eyes but obliged anyway; Charlie was one of the few people who could get away with that sort of thing. “So when’s the big date? How’ve you even been talking to this chick for two months? Don’t you usually get bored after two hours? Is this character development, Dean?”

“Jeez Charlie, one question at a time,” Dean grumbled, handing her a soda and taking a seat in the armchair.

“Okay, when’s the big date?”

“Next Friday, we’re going to that little Italian place downtown.”

“And how have you been talking to her for two months?”

Dean shrugged, he had no good answer for that question since he wasn’t entirely sure of the answer himself. He didn’t know what drew him to Cas, only that he _was_ drawn to her. “She’s cool, Charlie,” he shrugged again.

“Oh you’ve got it _so bad!_ Sam told me you were crushing but wow! Dean Winchester, ladies man extraordinaire, totally falling for a chick he hasn’t even met yet! This is gold, pure gold!”

“Charlie...” Dean’s voice had a warning to it but she just howled with laughter.

“No, you gotta let me have this one, you have to admit that’s hilarious. I bet you haven’t even looked at another chick since you met this Cas, right?”

Dean colored but said nothing; it was true, but he wasn’t about to admit that to Charlie. At first he was just busy but the last couple of parties he’d been to he’d been approached by several girls and had turned them all away... Charlie was right, Dean knew, he really did have it bad.

“Good job I’m staying for a couple of days then, I can help you get ready for your big daaaate. Man, I can’t believe you’ve fallen for someone you haven’t even met, I don’t know if I’ll ever get over this,” Charlie couldn’t stop laughing and Dean wanted to be mad at her but... His heart skipped a little as he thought of the date on Friday and, somehow, her teasing just didn’t seem important anymore.

“Shit,” he mumbled and put his head in his hands, drawing more laughter from Charlie, though she patted his shoulder sympathetically.

 

Dean glanced around the restaurant apprehensively and nervously undid the top button of his shirt, which Charlie had insisted he wear even though he usually only wore a t-shirt on his rare dates. He’d insisted on smart jeans, though, since the restaurant wasn’t _that_ upmarket and he didn’t want to look like he’d made too much of an effort. Cas must not be here yet, he decided, since there were no women who fit Sam’s description seated. The only person who came close was a guy sitting not far away talking to the waitress and Dean turned away, deciding to wait for her to show up before asking to be seated.

“...no but you do not understand, I am waiting for someone and I would much prefer to order when he arrives. You will only have to repeat yourself again anyway so please may I just have some water?”

Dean’s body went cold at the overly formal language he heard in the man’s deep, gravelly voice and turned back to look again at the guy with the dark hair he had earlier dismissed.

“ _Cas?_ ” he asked, unable to keep the incredulity from his voice.

The man turned his gaze on Dean as the waitress walked away and all doubt fled his mind when he saw the vivid blueness of those eyes – Sam hadn’t been exaggerating, if anything Dean felt he hadn’t done them justice. Cas gave him an apologetic half-smile and shrugged with a slight inclination of his head. Dean bolted. Cas frowned at the space Dean had occupied a second before and slumped down in his chair. That had been his expected reaction, but it was still disappointing.

Dean yanked his cell from his pocket, hitting Sam’s speed-dial and waiting for his brother to pick up.

“ _Cas is a dude!_ ” he hissed into the phone, pacing up and down in front of the restaurant as he tried to calm himself down.

“Yeah,” Sam replied shortly.

“And you didn’t think that might be useful information for me to know!”

“At first, no, and then I told Cas about your mistake and he told me not to tell you. You seemed so happy I didn’t wanna, you know, ruin that. Dean, where are you?”

“I’m,” he huffed loudly, “I’m outside the restaurant.”

“...did he see you?”

“Definitely.”

“Then what the fuck are you doing on the phone to me? Oh, hang on,” Dean heard another phone and voice in the background.

“Who’s that?”

“Cas’ brother, we figured if shit went bad it’d help us fix our brothers’ stupid if we were in the same place.”

“Huh. How much more of his family d’you know?”

“I’ve only met Gabe and Mike; Luke and Rafe are usually busy out of state.”

“ _Gabe_? Like, Novak?!” Dean’s voice was rising in pitch as his emotions spiralled out of control and he paced back and forth like a caged animal.

“Yeah, Dean, as in your professor. That’s why I was in his classroom that day, I needed to talk to him about your uncontrollable crush. Now will you shut up so I can listen to what he’s gotta say?”

Dean pressed his lips together as he heard Sam cover the receiver with his hand, murmured voices sounding amused in the background.

“Okay Deano, listen up,” Gabriel’s voice came on the line.

“Gabriel,” Dean growled but Gabe cut him off with a noise.

“Okay, so maybe you don’t wanna date my kid brother, that’s fine, but you were friends before and there’s no reason you can’t just have a nice meal together. Cassie hasn’t got many friends and he’s been practically bouncing around the apartment for weeks just cause someone’s talking to him about stuff that isn’t classwork. He figured you wouldn’t go out with him if he told you he was a guy, he hoped you’d take pity on him just to at least sit and talk for a while. I told him he was dreaming but you know what it’s like, kid brothers _never_ listen. Look, he never gets out of the house, spends all his time tutoring students because at least it’s guaranteed social interaction even if they hardly ever talk to him after they get what they need.” Dean had stopped pacing and was looking down at the ground feeling very, very small. “So can you just go and sit with him, even just for a bit? You guys get on well enough to have one meal together for fuck’s sake and after that you can just never talk to each other again, okay?”

There was a fumbling sound and Dean took a deep breath, calming himself, then Sam was back on the line.

“Yeah, basically what Gabe said. You’ve been more cheerful lately than I’ve ever seen you, I know you’ve got other friends but it doesn’t hurt to have one more, okay?”

“Alright, _alright_ jeez guys stop tryina guilt trip me. I’ll go have dinner with the guy. And tell Gabriel not to call him Cassie, he _hates_ that,” he snapped the phone shut and turned back to the entrance then stopped, taking a few more deep, calming breaths. He didn’t want to be angry at Cas – even though the guy had deceived him almost as much as his brother had – he just wanted to get this over with. When he felt more in control he pushed back through the doors and headed for the table where Cas was sitting looking down at his phone, neatly side-stepping the hostess and ordering two beers as he passed her.

Cas looked up with a start as the chair on the other side of the table scraped out and Dean flopped into it looking defeated.

“Hey, Cas.”

“Hello, Dean,” Cas looked at him apprehensively and Dean rubbed his face with his hand.

“Sorry I freaked like that,” he mumbled and Cas frowned, tilting his head to one side in confusion.

“I expected you would, in truth, although I did not expect you to return.”

They fell silent as the hostess brought them the drinks Dean had ordered and he momentarily felt bad as Cas looked at the bottle in front of him in confusion. She handed them both a menu and then sauntered away, hips swaying.

“Yeah well... I’m hungry,” Dean said evasively, glancing down at the menu. His eyes flicked back up to the other man as Cas studied the options and Dean took the opportunity to properly look at his ‘date’.

Cas had made more of an effort with his appearance than Dean had, though Dean suspected he was probably a pretty formal dresser in general if his speaking was anything to go by, and his hair was neatly spiked with some sort of wet-look gel. He wore smart jeans like Dean, thankfully, but over his dark pinstriped button-down he wore a charcoal vest and a tie. His eyes flicked up suddenly to Dean’s and held his gaze for a second before Dean blushed and looked away.

“Sorry,” he muttered, looking back down at his menu quickly.

“No need to apologize,” Dean looked back up at him as Cas spoke, “I understand you are probably trying to reconcile my appearance with your mental picture of ‘Cas’,” he made air-quotes with his fingers and Dean smiled in spite of himself, “so please do not worry.”

Cas looked back at his own menu and, permission given, Dean allowed himself a little longer to look at the man before he knew he would have to choose his own meal. He had a little shadow of stubble across his jaw, as though it grew faster than he could shave it so he was resigned to leaving the ghost of his scruff behind, and his blue eyes were a bright contrast to his dark hair and lightly tanned skin. He studied his menu with a fearsome intensity, as if it would jump out of his hands if he didn’t hold it in place with his gaze and Dean suddenly gave a low chuckle, turning his attention back to his own menu.

“What?” Cas looked over at him, again doing that confused head-tilt-frown combination and Dean nearly lost it, spluttering as he tried to stifle his laughter. “What is funny?”

“Just thinking,” Dean managed, getting himself under some semblance of control, “you are actually kinda cute, Cas,” he snorted another laugh but then froze as Cas fixed him with a chilling glare.

“Don’t say shit like that,” his voice was almost a snarl and Dean could do nothing but nod dumbly in acquiescence. They both looked back at their menus, tension thick in the air around them.

“Can I take your order?” The waitress said brightly moments later, bringing with her a gust of light perfume. She beamed down at them as they ordered and whisked their menus away, leaving Dean feeling exposed and awkward. He folded his fingers around his beer bottle tightly until his knuckles paled and stared at the peeling label until he thought it might combust spontaneously under his gaze.

“You don’t have to stay if you are uncomfortable, Dean,” Cas said eventually, his tone patient if a little irritated.

“What? No! I just...” Dean sighed heavily and picked at the label of his beer. He risked a glance up at Cas and was surprised to see him slumped in his chair looking semi-relaxed. “Look, if I’d known you were a guy I would still... okay I probably wouldn’t have invited you out for dinner but, y’know, coffee or drinks... guy stuff. And I was surprised to see you. And I fucked up. And I’m _sorry._ But you gotta give me _some_ slack here, Cas!” Dean was getting stressed out again and he took a deep breath, trying to control his confused emotions. “You knew you were leading me on and you still did it, I’m not sayin’ I’m not a big bag of dicks here but I was up front with you the whole time so can you at least accept that I’m _trying_ cause despite everything I still,” he snapped his mouth shut with an audible click of teeth, thinking quickly. “Still wanna be friends, I guess. If that’s okay.”

Cas colored at Dean’s words and lifted his beer bottle to his lips, lips Dean absolutely did _not_ look at as they closed around the rim of the bottle as he tilted it to take a long drink, giving himself time to think before he replied.

“Castiel.” He said eventually, resolutely not meeting Dean’s eyes.

“What?”

“My full name is Castiel. Cas for short. Cassie if you’re my dick brother Gabriel.”

“Castiel... Novak I guess?”

Cas nodded, tilting the bottle this way and that. “And I apologize for the deceit. Truly... had Sam told me sooner I would have certainly corrected you right away but... I was selfish.” His mouth turned down in a pained grimace and Dean unconsciously leaned toward him. “By that point I confess I,” he flushed, “it’s _stupid._ But I have grown fond of you. I was afraid that to tell you now you would stop speaking to me entirely. I can accept being rejected romantically, but I value your friendship Dean and I...” he stopped, pained expression turning agonized for the briefest of moments before Cas smoothed it over again and straightened up in his chair. “I would still like to remain friends too.”

They fell silent again, but this time it was a contemplative silence instead of awkwardly tense.

“Okay, so we’re gonna agree we’re both kinda stupid but we still wanna be friends anyway,” Cas nodded as Dean spoke, “okay, good, so. You seen Michael yet? Ah, the movie, not your brother.”

As if a blanket had been lifted from them they resolutely put that discussion behind them and moved on to more normal topics, hardly even noticing as the hostess brought their meals except for a brief expression of appreciation from them both at the heavenly smells from their plates. They chatted as they ate, ordering more beers and becoming slowly more relaxed as the alcohol seeped into their systems. When the hostess took away their plates and asked if they wanted the dessert menu they both readily agreed, Dean never one to pass up a chance to eat pie.

“So how come you go to church and stuff anyway, Cas?” Dean said around a mouthful of strawberry pie and whipped cream, darting his tongue out to lick away a flake of pastry from the corner of his mouth. “I mean, you swear and you mentioned an ex- _boyfriend_ so I’m guessing you’re not exactly straight, I thought that shit was frowned on or outright not allowed?”

Cas shrugged, toying with his dessert but not seeming all that interested in eating it. “Some are more... accepting than others. My parents are religious and we’ve attended that church my whole life. All of us are named after angels – Castiel, Michael, Lucifer, Gabriel, and Raphael – and when I came out they just kind of went ‘oh, okay’ and carried on. My church is more of the... loving and accepting rather than the smiting and judging kind of church,” he laughed and poked at his tiramisu again.

“For god’s sake are you gonna eat that or what?”

“It just doesn’t seem appetizing now it’s in front of me,” Cas shrugged, pushing the plate away.

“Should’ve ordered pie,” Dean advised sagely, devouring another forkful enthusiastically.

“I don’t know if I like pie, I usually like tiramisu.”

“You don’t... have you not tried pie!?” Dean’s mouth hung open and he immediately dug into his own dessert with his fork, picking up a decent sized forkful and smothering it in whipped cream before holding it out to Cas. “I don’t share pie so take it before I change my mind,” he growled.

Lowering his eyelids flirtatiously Cas leaned forward and closed his lips around the piece of pie on Dean’s fork, making the man gulp at the sudden rush of heat to his face. As he pulled back and began to chew Cas slumped down in his seat and moaned at the flood of flavor; Dean coughed and looked around nervously but nobody seemed to notice the positively pornographic noises his not-date was making.

“Wow, that was delicious,” Cas said in a breathy voice that definitely did not make Dean’s heart skip a beat. Looking down at the remains of the pie on his plate Dean gave a heavy sigh and put his fork down on top of it, passing it over the table reluctantly.

“Go on, I’ve eaten tons of pie, you enjoy it,” he grumbled; Cas didn’t need telling twice and he eagerly took the plate, devouring the rest of the piece slowly and savoring each mouthful, though managing at least to keep the indecent noises to a minimum this time. “I guess I’m gonna have to educate you in pie as well as movies then,” Dean joked when Cas had all but licked the plate clean.

“If they are all as delicious as that I think that is an education I will greatly value,” Cas said in the same breathy tone, a little awed that something so simple as a dessert could bring him so much enjoyment.

“Dude, you think strawberry’s good wait’ll you try apple,” Dean grinned, pleased Cas could relate to his enthusiasm for the pastry.

“I can’t wait,” Cas nodded and they both laughed.

Noticing they had finished their desserts – Dean ended up eating the tiramisu and agreed it was good, but not _pie_ good – their hostess sashayed over, her gaze lingering on Cas as she cleared away their plates and left them to their coffee. Moments later she returned, holding out a slip of paper to each man separately.

“Here’s your checks, guys,” she said sweetly, fluttering her eyelashes at Cas and letting her hand linger on his fingers as he took the paper from her.

“Uh, what?” Dean frowned, leaning over to snatch the paper from Cas who stared at him in shock.

“Hey!” The waitress looked angry, hands on her hips as she glared down at Dean who flipped open the paper.

“Lady you are barking so far up the wrong tree,” Dean growled, feeling suddenly possessive as he saw her name and number written on the top of the bill. Scrunching up both pieces of paper he held them out to her. “Just bring me the damn check already,” he said and she strode off in a huff.

“What was that all about?” Cas made his confused frown-and-tilt expression again.

“Aw you don’t wanna get the number of some waitress anyway,” Dean said, coloring slightly, “and I said I’d pay for dinner already, not gonna go back on my word just cause things didn’t work out exactly how I expected.”

“How chivalrous of you,” he sounded amused, “defending my honor _and_ treating me. If I was less of a realist I might be getting my hopes up about now,” he raised an eyebrow and Dean flushed brighter.

“Shut up,” he growled but Cas only laughed.

“Considering all of those times you said I was cute and adorable you are doing an admirable impression of that yourself,” he said, wrinkling his nose in amusement.

Dean groaned and leaned forward, resting his head on his hands on the table. Cas reached over and tousled his hair affectionately at the exact moment the waitress returned with the combined check, slamming it down angrily and making Dean jump. He frowned at her, annoyed at the interruption.

“Sorry, I saw her coming and couldn’t resist,” Cas chuckled, digging in his pockets for his wallet.

“I said I’d pay,” Dean said quickly, pulling his own wallet out and withdrawing a few bills. He even left a tip for the surly waitress, he couldn’t blame her for being attracted to Cas after all and up until that point she _had_ been attentive and pleasant. They got up and left quickly, barrelling out into the cool evening air in relief.

“Thank you, Dean,” Cas murmured, hands shoved deeply in his pockets, “you didn’t have to but I appreciate it.”

“No problems buddy,” Dean replied with a shrug.

They stood there awkwardly, neither of them particularly wanting to end the not-date but also not wanting to make the other feel obliged to continue it. After a couple of minutes of just looking at each other Cas suddenly laughed, breaking the eye contact and scuffing his shoe on the ground as he chuckled.

“What’s funny?”

“Nothing, would you like to go for a walk? There is not much else to do at this time in the evening but I am reluctant to invite you back to my place in case my intentions are misconstrued. A walk is safe though, right?”

Dean visibly relaxed, he’d been thinking something along the same lines but after his initial outburst he felt like he didn’t have any right to ask Cas for anything. “Sure, a walk sounds great.”

 

They ended up in the park on the other side of the campus, walking along the well-lit route by the small lake and chatting amiably as they went along about anything and nothing. 

“You know this is the route I usually jog, when I don’t have time to go to the park in the city,” Cas confessed conversationally and Dean looked sideways at him and snorted. 

“I don’t get you exercise freak guys, Sam’s just as bad. Gets up at the crack of dawn to go running and then does a mountain of push ups and shit when he gets back. I don’t understand the fascination, personally.” His tone was light, teasing and Cas responded with a grin. He nudged Dean with his shoulder and pulled his hands out of his pockets, trotting a couple of steps ahead and turning to face the other man as he walked backwards with a playful look on his face.

“It may be weird to you but it is sensible for us kid brothers to have good running abilities. It means when older brothers realise they have been pranked you can escape,” his eyes flicked up to Dean’s hair and he grinned as Dean frowned and ran his fingers through the short strands. His face twisted in a grimace as shredded beer labels from their restaurant table showered down around his shoulders like confetti; Cas had obviously put them there when he tousled Dean’s hair earlier.

“You son of a-“ he started and lunged for the older man but Cas was off like a hare, zig-zagging across the well mown grass and giving Dean more than a good run for his money. They laughed uproariously until eventually Cas slowed down just enough for Dean to get within arm’s length of him, then sprinted away again. He was more of an endurance runner, really, but Dean was less fit and began to flag long before Cas. 

“Alright, okay, time out,” Dean gasped, sucking in great breaths as he doubled over with his hands on his knees and tried to catch his breath. 

“Still do not see the value in exercise?” Cas quipped as he turned and walked back to Dean, a little breathless but otherwise none the worse for wear.

“Okay, maybe a little,” Dean shot back, lifting his head to look at Cas as the older man stopped a couple of steps in front of him, “but I always thought football was more fun,” he laughed suddenly and lunged forward to tackle Cas to the ground. He pinned the smaller man to the grass easily and laughed as he sat astride him and held him down as Cas struggled. At first Cas laughed with him but within seconds his expression became sharp and he glared up at Dean crossly.

“This makes me very uncomfortable, Dean,” he growled, ceasing his struggles.

Dean laughed and rolled off him onto his back, looking up at the sky as his breathing finally started to slow. He resisted the urge to look over at Cas, not wanting to see if he was angry with him. They lay in silence for a few moments and just listened to the faint city sounds from beyond the park boundaries. 

“Sorry,” Dean said eventually. He wasn’t sure why he felt he should apologise, it wasn’t like he had never wrestled in the grass with another guy before. Hell, he and Sam spent half their time tussling when they came out here, fighting over frisbees or who would get to ask out the leggy blonde who just walked by. 

“Me too,” Cas’ voice was quiet, regret evident in his tone. 

Silence fell again and Dean felt light-headed as his blood pounded inexplicably through him; he focussed on steadying his breathing and pulled handfuls of grass out of the ground beside him as he tried to make sense of his sudden feeling of shame. He hadn’t wanted to lead Cas on, he really had enjoyed talking to him and there was no denying Cas had helped him out a lot with his studies. Of course, having Gabriel - Dean’s _professor -_ as a brother probably helped and Dean wondered for an instant if Gabe would retract his grades if he felt Dean was getting an unfair advantage over the other students by asking Cas for help. He shoved the thought away; failing his minor would be a small price to pay for getting to know Cas. Dean was surprised by how easily that thought came to him but the instant it did he realised it was true. Aside from the awkwardness at the beginning of their not-date he _had_ enjoyed himself and he liked to think Cas had too. Steeling himself, he risked a glance over to his companion and- oh. 

Cas had tucked his arms up underneath his head and closed his eyes, turning his face up into the light breeze. His eyelashes fanned out across his cheek and even the shade of his unrelenting stubble couldn’t ruin the play of the moonlight on his skin, highlighting the tip of his nose and his sharp cheekbones while shadows pooled in the hollows of his eyes and the dip beneath his lower lip. Dean’s heart gave an irritating thud and he swallowed to try and encourage some saliva into his suddenly dry mouth. Okay, he wasn’t thinking _anything_ , but even Dean had to admit the man was _gorgeous_. Dean opened his mouth, his body bypassing his brain for an instant, but before he got any words out his clicked his teeth shut again and tore his gaze away, mimicking Cas’ pose and squeezing his eyes shut to push down the urge to gape at him some more. 

 _Shit._  

They lay there for so long Dean was about to think Cas had dozed off when the other man suddenly spoke.

“I apologize for before, I understand it’s quite normal for guys to…” he trailed off and Dean risked a glance but quickly looked away at the frankly adorable look of perplexion on Cas’ face, “ _roughhouse_ , and I would like us to have a normal friendship but I really do _not_ need you pinning me down right now.”

Dean swallowed thickly, his tongue felt about three sizes too big for his mouth. “Oh, right.” He would normally have found himself making some kind of quip, a flirtatious suggestion to ease the tension in the air, but right now his traitorous brain was throwing all kinds of _wholly inappropriate_ suggestions at him so he settled for monosyllabic. 

“I am still adjusting my own mental picture of ‘Dean’, you understand,” Cas explained further, casting a worried look Dean’s way.

“Yep,” Dean gave a nod to emphasize his understanding. 

There were a few heartbeats of silence and then “are you okay?” Cas sat up and frowned at his companion, tilting his head in concern. 

Dean’s head span, why was he noticing Cas in such detail? Why did his chest feel so tight? Why was his mouth so dry? Oh god, was he going to throw up in front of this devilishly handsome guy? His stomach clenched and Dean lurched into a sitting position suddenly.

“I think I’m having a heart attack,” he moaned, burying his face in his hands. He jerked, startled, as Cas’ hand clasped him on the shoulder an instant later, those concerned blue eyes swimming in his vision as Cas pushed into his personal space and pressed two fingers to his pulse.

“I don’t think you are having a heart attack, Dean, though your pulse is significantly elevated,” Cas frowned as Dean’s heartbeat jumped under his fingers, “perhaps a panic attack?”

Dean groaned again and closed his eyes, whimpering as he shuffled to move away from Cas. This close he could smell the aftershave he’d used, the unnecessarily fruity scent of his hair product and pick out the careful embroidery on his tie. All details he didn’t want to notice, all details he couldn’t _help_ but notice. He sensed Cas draw away and hoped he wasn’t giving him the wounded puppy look as Dean breathed carefully into his hands, trying to slow his racing heart. Cracking one eye open he huffed in annoyance as he felt his face flame red - Cas was _staring_ at him in hurt and confusion like he wasn’t the damn _cause_ of this whole issue. 

“Fuck, Cas, don’t look at me like that man,” he grumbled, finally starting to feel himself again. 

“Dean, why are you having a panic attack in the park?”

“I’m not having a panic attack,” Dean snapped and Cas shrank away. 

“Sorry. Why are you _hyperventilating_ then?” 

Dean swore and no longer felt the need to apologize for it. He swore every word of English he knew then continued in several more languages, most of which made Cas chuckle but a couple that made his ears tinge pink. ‘ _Good,’_ Dean thought mercilessly; Cas deserved a little discomfort. He threw himself back to the ground and then, almost as an afterthought, leaned up and pulled Cas back into a lying down position again, leaving his hand on the guy’s arm. 

“I can’t look at you,” Dean grumbled and Cas glanced across at him, frowning. “Okay so my old man died in a car accident, right? Well the reason we were, shit, okay look. He was a great guy and he did the best he could for us after mom died. But he was ex-military and you know what those kinds of guys are like, right? Anyway, the point is that he was driving a little crazy that night. And it was cause,” Dean hesitated, his grip on Cas’ arm tightening almost painfully, but Cas was willing to endure it if it meant hearing the end of this story. 

“I, uh, always had a reputation as a bit of a ladykiller in high school. Dad worked long hours to support us and left me and Sammy alone a lot so I always got him up and ready for school and cooked him dinner at night and did my best to help him with his homework and shit. And when he went to sleep over at some kid’s house and dad was at work, well… I had the place to myself, you know? 

“There was this one kid in my class I just couldn’t keep my eyes off of and eventually I bit the bullet and took advantage of my empty place. I usually didn’t take chicks home ‘cause if they fall asleep y’can’t sneak off. Kid’s name was, uh,” Dean’s cheeks tinged pink and he hoped Cas didn’t notice in the low light, “Jimmy. Except for the first time in, like, _years_ , dad decided to clock out early and kind of caught us making out on the couch. He was _pissed_ , Cas. He drove Jimmy home with me in the car and almost as soon as the kid got out he was off, yelling and screaming at me. It wasn’t so bad, I think he was just surprised and I reckon he’d have come around to the idea eventually. Dad was pretty cool about most things. But I was young and I was mad and I yelled back at him. He turned to say something and a-“ Dean sucked in a deep breath and stopped talking. He blinked furiously but not quickly enough to stop a fat tear tracking down his face, blessedly on the side away from Cas. He hadn’t spoken to anyone but Sam about that night, and he’d left out ‘Jimmy’ from the version of the story Sam got. “It was a semi, driver was all but asleep at the wheel. He ran a stop sign and dad didn’t even see him cause he was looking at me, yelling at _me._ He died and it’s on me,” he shut his eyes and gave a shuddering breath. 

Cas knew there were no words he could say to help Dean. They’d known each other a while but he was in no position to counsel or console his new friend. He settled for silent reassurance, and covered the hand holding his bicep with his own, squeezing gently. He managed to bite back his sigh of relief as Dean loosened his grip, fingers flexing as if he wanted to catch hold of Cas’ hand but was resisting. 

“Anyway, I rebuilt the car and took care of Sammy and didn’t look at another guy since.” Dean’s voice was steadier now. “And then I show up for a date with some cute piece of tail with eyes like friggin’ pools of blue or whatever only to find out the cute, bookish chick I was expecting is actually a _dude_ who’s hot as all get out and actually a really decent guy too.” Dean groaned again and finally pulled his hand away from Cas’ arm. The older guy sat up, looking down at Dean with a strange expression. Dean huffed, threw his arm over his eyes and waited. And waited. And _waited._ He wasn’t sure exactly what he was waiting for, but he couldn’t bring himself to say another word. 

“Why did you tell me this, Dean?” Cas asked him eventually in a quiet tone.

“Dunno,” Dean replied truthfully, if a little childishly. 

“I’m sorry about your father,” he said even more quietly and Dean heard him shift so he was no longer scrutinizing him. 

“Thanks.” Dean was about to say something more when his shrill text tone startled him and he dug into his pocket to retrieve the offending device, grumbling. 

 _Gabriel’s gonna stay over, can you crash at their place tonight?_  

**I dunno, I’ll ask. Dude’s got a crush on you, figure it’s only fair to tell you.**

_I should hope so considering we’ve been dating for weeks. We’re not all repressed closet cases like you, Dean. Gabe says you can sleep in his bed, if things aren’t going well with you and Cas. He changed the sheets this morning._

Dean blinked at his phone. “Son of a bitch,” he growled and tossed it over to Cas, who was watching him curiously.

“Ah, well that would explain why Sam and Gabriel seemed to be talking more than usual lately. Would you believe I half thought it had something to do with you? Of course you’re welcome to stay over, though I would strongly recommend the couch over Gabriel’s bed. He is not the tidiest of people and you’re as likely to trip and break your neck crossing his room as you are to step in something gross and probably holding independent elections…” 

They laughed at his joke and rose from the grass, brushing themselves off. It was starting to get late and the thought of Gabriel staying over at his place with _Sam_ had thoroughly quashed the serious turn the not-date had taken. They began to walk back to the car when Dean let out a sudden yelp of triumph that startled a cry out of Cas, too.

“That means I was right about Sammy! I mean, I guess I get that Gabe was driving at you not being a chick all along, but I was on the money about him being gay, right?” He beamed at Cas who only chuckled and shook his head.

“Maybe he’s not gay, only less rigid in his amorous pursuits than you,” he jibed.

“Aw Cas,” Dean’s mouth turned down and he felt suddenly chastised.

“Relax, Dean, I am teasing you,” Cas smirked as they pulled open the doors to the Impala and got in. 

 

Cas had walked to the restaurant - he’d actually chosen it particularly for that reason, preparing himself for things to go horribly wrong - so it took mere minutes to reach the apartment he shared with Gabriel in the Impala. Dean whistled as they parked up, though he wasn’t really all that surprised that it was a nice place since he knew Gabriel was pretty well off. Cas let them both in and headed for the mail slot in what Dean assumed was a habitual gesture, since halfway there he tutted, rolled his eyes and altered his course for the elevator. 

“Already checked the mail, huh?” Dean chuckled.

“Yes,” came the simple reply as Cas led him to the elevator and jabbed the button with a long finger. The bell sounded a moment later and they were soon traveling upwards in silence, no vapid elevator music to help the short journey along. Castiel stepped out into his hallway and Dean followed, his hands in his pockets as he took in the warm glow of the hall lights until he finally stepped through the open apartment door. He whistled again more quietly and turned on the spot to get a better look at the apartment.

It was a harsh contrast to the small one he shared with Sam, dim and smelling faintly of old mold; this apartment practically _shone_. One wall wasn’t a wall at all but a huge floor to ceiling window that appeared to lead out onto a small balcony just large enough for a table and two chairs. To the right was a kitchenette with a big double fridge (complete with icemaker) and gleaming appliances that was fenced in by a breakfast bar, all topped with black marble. It was probably a bitch to keep clean, he thought. To the right of the fridge he noticed a small door shut firmly and wondered what was beyond it, but it would probably have been rude to ask.

To his left was obviously the lounge; the wall had a frankly enormous flatscreen TV fixed to it and underneath he could see games consoles and a DVD player next to their cable box and a stack of DVDs that hadn’t been put away. He made a mental note to bring Star Wars with him next time he came over and then silently berated himself for assuming he’d be invited again. The couch was a soft brown suede that looked like he would sink right into it when he sat down and a glass coffee table sat equidistant between the wall and the couch - too far away to be comfortable to put drinks on but fitting the overall look of the room nicely. On a shelf underneath the glass top Dean glimpsed a number of books and magazines and wondered which belonged to Cas and which were Gabe’s. Cas didn’t really seem like the kind of person to read magazines, given his extensive vocabulary, but he knew better than to make assumptions… Well, he was trying hard to learn that lesson, anyway. 

On either side of the TV were two more doors - one by the wall the front door was in and one by the enormous window - and Dean really hoped one of those was the bathroom. If he was going to be sleeping on the couch he really didn’t want to have to be creeping into someone’s bedroom if he suddenly felt the urge to pee in the night. He resolutely ignored the tiny skip of his heart at the thought of creeping into Cas’ room in the middle of the night; even if he _were_ that way inclined, which he isn’t, he slammed the door shut on that when he ran out of the restaurant right at the start of this totally-not-date so his stupid body could just _shut. up._

“Make yourself comfortable,” Cas said, motioning towards the couch as he made his way into the kitchen. Dean settled himself down and eyed the DVDs on the stand while he listened to Cas clattering about in the kitchen, the click-whoosh of a gas burner piquing his curiosity.

“Woah, Cas, this is a seriously nice place,” he called, toeing off his shoes and edging forward to run his finger along the DVDs and smiling at some of them, memories of watching them with Sam or Charlie springing to mind.

“Put on one, if you like,” Cas replied and Dean winced guiltily but chose an older title he hadn’t seen in years anyway, slipping it into the player and hunting around for the remote to turn on the TV. 

 _‘Aziz, light!’_ came from the TV a few minutes later as Cas joined Dean on the couch, pressing a steaming cup of something that smelled _heavenly_ into his hands.

“Hot chocolate, Cas?” Dean sounded amused but curled into the corner of the couch with his feet tucked underneath him and the mug held up to his nose. 

Cas only smiled faintly and put his own mug on the floor by his feet before shedding his waistcoat and loosening his tie with a relieved sigh. He rested his head on the back of the couch, closing his eyes and listening as the sounds of the sci-fi movie Dean had chosen built to a crescendo. They watched the movie quietly, laughing together and occasionally throwing in bits of commentary ( _“this blue chick was bad ass” “Gabriel says Ruby Rhod is his spirit animal, whatever that means” “nah, he’s a meat popsicle”)_ and Dean found himself relaxing, unfolding as the heat from his drink spread through his body until he lounged comfortably on his side of the sofa, tucking his feet under Cas’ leg to keep his toes warm. That earned him one of Castiel’s small smiles though neither of them said anything about it. 

As the credits finally began to roll Dean risked a glance at Cas, something he had been avoiding. It wasn’t that he didn’t feel comfortable around Cas, in fact the problem _was_ that he didn’t feel uncomfortable at all. This evening should have been a mess of awkward conversations and strained silences leading up to a clumsy handshake before they went their separate ways but instead they had talked about their lives, their interests, joked about their brothers and even flirted a little, albeit shyly. Dean had told Cas about the circumstances around his dad’s death and he was still reeling from the admission. He hadn’t told _anyone_ the real reason he and his dad were driving that night, the reason his dad’s focus wasn’t wholly on the road. Sam knew bits and pieces, knew they had been arguing, but Dean had felt so guilty that his stupid crush had caused his father’s death he just couldn’t bring himself to tell his brother the truth. He’d suppressed anything the reminded him of that ever since, hooking up with girls more and more frequently just so he’d have a warm body to distract him from the turmoil he felt whenever he found his gaze straying towards… 

Cas was slouching in his seat, his empty cup held loosely in his grip and eyelids drooping sleepily. He’d managed to stay awake through the movie but it was past midnight and he hadn’t been able to sleep well the previous night. Dean wriggled his toes under Cas’ leg, startling him into wakefulness and he grinned as Cas fixed him with an irritated glare. 

“Wanna watch another movie?” Dean teased but Cas didn’t back down, getting up to put away The Fifth Element and slipping another disc into the player. “Dude, you’re falling asleep, you don’t have to watch another.” 

“I can go as long as you can,” Cas shot back gruffly, flopping down on Dean’s feet again and pressing play. Dean raised an eyebrow but Cas resolutely refused to look at him and Dean returned his attention to the TV again when the first bars of a familiar song played over the DVD menu. 

“Dude, _Michael?_ ” 

“I bought it after you recommended it but haven’t had a chance to watch it yet.”

“Well, it’s better than It’s A Wonderful Life for angel movies, anyway,” Dean snorted. 

“What’s It’s A Wonderful Life?” Cas looked over and fixed Dean with the frown-and-tilt expression he was quickly coming to associate with the blue-eyed man. 

“It’s another movie, we’ll watch it some other time,” Dean promised and Cas nodded, turning back to the movie. 

Dean swallowed thickly and tried to focus on Michael but the implied agreement there, that he would be allowed to come back and watch movies with Cas again, was proving to be an effective distraction. He tried to put it down to the fact that it was nearly one in the morning and he was tired, but he soon felt the light-headedness from the park returning and lurched to his feet. 

“Uh, bathroom?” He asked stupidly as Cas looked up at him sleepily.

Cas pointed to the door closest to the window and Dean fled to the relative safety of the other room as quickly as he could without seeming suspicious, locking the door behind him. He sat down on the toilet seat and put his head between his legs, fighting the dizziness and working to get his breathing back under control. What was _wrong_ with him? 

 _‘Okay, let’s work this out logically,’_ he thought, breathing deeply and as quietly as he could so Cas wouldn’t wonder what was wrong. _‘Cas is a dude. He’s cool, and funny and awesome. But still a dude. Not a nerdy chick. A dude. Okay, I’ll admit he’s attractive, hot even, but he’s still a_ dude _. And I’m not into dudes. I don’t care that his eyes are ridiculous and he looks at me like I’m the most interesting thing in the room.’_ Dean got up and glared at himself in the mirror before running the tap and cupping his hands underneath the cold stream, splashing the water on his face in the hope that it would help him calm down. 

‘ _Why did he have to turn out to be a guy? Why did I have to insist we met? We had a good thing going, it was nice to have someone to talk to about stuff and Cas always helped me out with school… I shoulda kept my mouth shut, dammit.’_ He gave himself another fierce look in the mirror but it was interrupted by a knock at the door.

“Damn,” he muttered, drying his face.

“Dean? Are you okay? You looked like you were going to be ill,” Castiel’s tone was full of genuine concern and Dean winced; it must have looked crazy how he all-but ran from the room. 

“Yeah, I’m fine,” he called back, replacing the towel on the rail and opening the door, practically walking right into Cas as he stepped out of the room. “Ah, sorry,” he mumbled sheepishly but made no move to step around the older man. He just stood and stared, rooted to the spot by something he couldn’t control. He felt his heart speed up again but, blessedly, his breathing remained almost normal.

“Dean,” Cas said, his voice almost stern.

“C-Cas,” Dean breathed with a gulp, his eyes flicking down to the curve of the man’s lips before meeting his eyes again.

“You are rather in my personal space, Dean, and I would like to use my bathroom.” 

“Right! Right, sorry,” Dean stepped to the side hastily and watched as Cas calmly walked into the bathroom and shut the door behind him. Dean stood and stared at the door for several long minutes, blinking slowly and blankly at the solid wood as if his brain was unable to function without Castiel in the room. When Cas emerged a moment later, a smudge of toothpaste at the corner of his mouth, he stopped short and looked at Dean curiously, still standing exactly where he left him.

“Are you okay, Dean?” 

“I, yeah, sorry, I’m fine,” Dean stammered, shaken from his trance. “You’ve got some toothpaste,” he flicked at the corner of his own mouth with a finger and Cas understood, his tongue darting out to collect the residue. Dean swallowed but couldn’t take his eyes from Castiel’s face, that wet, pink tongue swiping at the toothpaste mesmerizing him. Cas frowned, his eyes half-closing into a squint and put a hand on Dean’s arm gently, leaning forward with concern. 

“Do you need to lie down?” 

Dean closed his eyes, the feel of Cas’ touch through the sleeve of his shirt electrifying. His exhausted brain screamed at him, lewd thoughts of how it would feel to have Cas’ hands on his skin, to run his own over Cas’ body, to press together in his bed assaulted him and he took a deep, shaky breath as he tried to push them away. 

“Dean,” Castiel’s voice became authoritative and the younger man’s eyes snapped open in surprise. He was mere inches from Cas’ face and the blue of his eyes was intense as he held his gaze. Their faces were so close he could smell the faint mint of Castiel’s toothpaste and suddenly felt self-conscious of his own breath, clenching his teeth together and forcing himself to breathe through his nose. But that didn’t help at all because then the scent of Cas’ cologne filled him, his fruity hair product mingling with the minty toothpaste and he felt suddenly dizzy again. “What’s wrong? Tell me so I can help you,” Cas sounded tired, exasperated and Dean felt guilty for his amateur theatrics tonight. 

“Give me a sec,” he muttered, taking long careful breaths and resisting the urge to close his eyes once more. His mind raced and Dean hurriedly tried to put them in order. 

Fact: He had been happier in the last few weeks than he could remember being in months, years even.

Fact: Tutor Cas was a great conversationalist; witty and interesting, inadvertently funny and cute as a button when he was mad.

Fact: Even though Dean had acted like a complete dick tonight Real Cas had still been patient with him, let him stay and had only gotten snippy with him whenever Dean overstepped their fragile boundaries.

Fact: Sammy was dating the guy’s brother so he probably didn’t give two shakes of a rat’s ass what Dean did and with whom as long as he was safe.

Fact: Charlie reckoned Dean was falling for Cas before they even met.

Fact: Dean wasn’t entirely sure she’d been wrong.

Fact: Cas was hot.

Fact: Cas smelled amazing.

Fact: Dean really, _really_ wanted to kiss him right now.

And that realisation hit Dean like a ton of bricks, forcing his breath out of him and making his skin prickle as a light sweat broke out over his body.

“Shit, Cas,” Dean murmured, and Cas raised an eyebrow at him.

“Are you feeling better now?”

“How much of a massive prick will it make me if I said no, because my brain’s short-circuiting being this close to you?” Dean asked tremulously, lowering his eyes and trying to find a neutral spot to look at. 

Cas jerked back an inch in surprise but didn’t move his hand from Dean’s arm. He had thought Dean was ill, something he’d eaten at the restaurant disagreeing with him, perhaps. It hadn’t occurred to him that this might be the reason, even after Dean’s confession in the park that he maybe wasn’t _wholly_ straight, and Cas really wasn’t sure what to do with that information - he’d spent the whole evening doing his best not to think of Dean in that way, to simply enjoy their new friendship… if this was a joke it was a cruel one.

“I… Dean, I am confused. If I recall, _you_ are the one with hang-ups over this, not I. I am willing to respect your space, even though you appear unwilling to do the same, and your feelings on the matter. Toying with me is… well, yes, it does make you a rather enormous prick.”

Dean huffed, shame making his cheeks flush as he looked up at Cas and tried for defiant, defensive of his words. “It’s not _my_ fault! Maybe if you weren’t so damn nice and so damn gorgeous and didn’t smell so damn good I wouldn’t want to fucking kiss you so badly!” Cas’ eyebrows shot up and he dropped his hand from Dean’s arm, though to the younger man’s surprise he didn’t step away. Dean clenched his fists and made a frustrated sound, unable to stop now he’d started his accidental confession. “I’ve really enjoyed talking to you and even Sammy said I’ve been annoyingly cheerful and it’s ‘cause of _you_ and my best friend Charlie said I’ve got it bad and she was _right_ and then you had to turn out to be a guy and I thought that would be the end of it but I just can’t… I can’t stop looking at you, at your hands and your stupid fucking waistcoat and your hair - which is probably a crime against nature, by the way - and your fucking _eyes,_ man and, and-“ he knew what he wanted to say next. _I can’t stop looking at your lips._ But instead he took a deep breath and clenched his jaw again, relaxing his hands as he breathed out and trying to calm the turmoil inside him. 

Cas was quiet, still standing mere inches away from Dean. It would only take the tiniest of movements to bring them together, their lips, their bodies, and he could see every tiny movement of the other man. Dean watched emotions flicker across his face, each one appearing like a tic before being smoothed away then replaced by another. Amongst them all, Dean thought he saw a minute flicker of… hope? 

“You could, if you want,” Cas said eventually, his voice almost a whisper. “K-Kiss me, I mean. If you wanted to try…” 

Cas didn’t get the chance to finish his sentence before Dean closed the distance between them, pressing his lips to Cas’ in what was possibly the most chaste kiss of his adult life. He couldn’t remember kissing anyone this shyly since he was sixteen and kissing Robin on the porch swing at her parents’ house. He pulled away after only a brief moment to check Cas’ reaction. The other man looked bewildered, tired and… relieved? Dean kissed him again, this time lifting his hand to the back of his neck and kissing him slowly, gently. Cas made a strangled sound and shuffled closer, lacing his fingers into Dean’s hair after a moment of fearful hovering, as if he were afraid touching Dean might make him back off. 

 

It was like a dam breaking, the first few shy kisses slipping through the cracks as Dean worked through his own reluctance and Cas masked his surprise at the sudden turn of the evening, then as the cracks widened their kisses became more heated and soon they were pressed together, hands exploring each other until they were forced to break for air. Panting, they held each other close until Cas reluctantly disentangled his fingers from Dean’s hair and stepped back - not far, though, as he was blocked by the closed bathroom door.

“Dean,” he said breathlessly, holding his hands up as Dean tried to close the gap between them, unable to stand the sudden distance now he’d gotten a taste of the dark-haired man. “Is this really wise? Are you going to look back on this tomorrow or the next day and believe it a mistake? I don’t… I would rather just remain friends than nothing at all.” His voice was quiet, as if speaking the words aloud frightened him.

“I meant it, Cas,” Dean replied, pushing past his upturned hands to crowd him against the door, leaning down to pepper his jaw with kisses. “I’ve been trying all night to get you outta my head, to stick with the ‘just-friends’ thing. I had an almost friggin’ panic attack in the goddamn _park_ because you were lying there all relaxed and you were fucking _gorgeous_ and it scared me ‘cause I was trying so hard not to be attracted to you.” Dean’s hands were on Cas’ waist, his thumbs rubbing tiny circles into his shirt and Cas rested his own hands lightly on Dean’s hips in return. “So yeah, it might take me a bit of getting used to, and I’m not gonna promise that I _won’t_ freak out a little bit sometimes… but I think you’re worth working through whatever issues I’ve got, cause this?” He leaned back and looked Cas in the eyes, sweeping a hand through his hair and then cupping his face with fingers damp from Cas’ hair gel. “This feels right to me.” Dean leaned down and pressed his lips to Cas’ again and it felt more like a _promise_ than a simple kiss, an admission without words. 

Cas couldn’t help it, he let out the smallest, almost inaudible moan and kissed Dean back fiercely, holding him tight as want coursed through them both. Their heated bodies pressed together and Cas let out a squeak of surprise as he felt Dean’s hardness press against his hip. He pressed back and grinned as Dean let out a heady moan and kissed him harder. 

 _“Remember what John and Paul said. The apostles? No, The Beatles. All you need is love.”_ The movie on the TV was still playing and Cas pulled away with a laugh, not quite sure if the line was appropriate or not but finding it somehow hilarious anyway. Dean let Cas push him away gently; not a rejection, just so he could step past him and turn off the movie. He followed him like a puppy, reaching out to touch his shoulder, wrist, waist, brushing his fingers across the back of his neck and making Cas shudder. Somehow, now he’d broken that barrier of _guymanmaledudenodonottouchnotmen_ he couldn’t get enough of Castiel, hated being separated from him for a second, hated how empty his arms felt without Cas between them, hated how his lips tingled without them crushed against Cas’ or being prickled by his scruff. Cas turned back and took his hand, lacing their fingers together and stepping in close to press soft, gentle kisses to Dean’s throat. 

“You’re not gonna make me sleep on the couch, are you?” Dean whispered as they surfaced for air for the second time. 

“Not if you don’t want to,” Cas whispered back, irises a tiny cobalt ring around his lust-blown pupils, trying to take in as much of Dean as he could. 

Dean shook his head, no he didn’t want to sleep on the couch, so Cas led him to the door on the other side of the TV. Dean assumed that meant the door on the other side of the apartment was Gabe’s room, but curious thoughts about his professor’s room flew out of his head as Cas pushed open his bedroom door and led him inside. 

The room was immaculate, painted a uniform shade of some mid-tone brown that actually made the room seem warm and inviting when coupled with the low light from the lamps on the nightstands. There were a few pictures on the walls, some framed photos and some painted canvases, and on the back wall Dean saw a dresser and wardrobe. The right side of the room had two desks; one had a laptop, scanner and printer resting on the dark, stained wood, and the other held textbooks, paper and writing tools. Dean’s attention was drawn inexorably to the bed; a king-sized, luxurious looking thing that was neatly made with bright, colourful bedding. Cas hovered, quietly letting him take in the room and not wanting to pressure him into… anything. 

Dean turned to see him standing there in the low light, worrying at his lower lip with his teeth, and he smiled fondly. The last traces of doubt were chased from his mind as he crossed the short distance and put his arms around his lover, pulling him in close and just _holding_ him. He felt Castiel’s heartbeat through their shirts, let the short hairs at the nape of his neck tickle his fingertips, placed his hand gently in the curve of his lower back and just drank in the feel and smell of him. He felt like he could get used to this; no urgent kissing or lustful rutting, just standing with this man in his arms and never letting him go. He pulled away just enough to catch Cas’ lips with his own, laving at the chewed lip with his tongue before licking into Cas’ mouth as he sighed happily. The kiss was soft, gentle with no demands or urgency, just Dean and Cas exploring each other with an almost reverent care that contrasted their earlier heat like a soothing balm. _This_ was right. _This_ was how it was meant to be. Dean had had his share of one-night stands - Cas had, too - but instinctively they knew this wouldn’t be one of them. They broke apart and Cas stepped away from Dean with a wistful look, crossing the room to the dresser to pull out two pairs of pajamas and handing one to Dean. 

“There’s also a spare toothbrush in the unit under the sink,” Cas smiled then kissed him again, as if to prove he wasn’t making a remark on the state of Dean’s breath. Dean kissed him back and went willingly back to the bathroom to change and brush his teeth in record time, though he tapped on the door before re-entering so as not to catch Cas mid-change. 

Cas was sitting on the bed with his legs crossed, looking at the door as Dean returned to him with his clothes bundled under his arm. He looked up, almost startled even though he’d called him in at Dean’s knock, and his eyes crinkled at the corners as he smiled. Dean dropped his neatly folded clothes and crossed the room in a few swift steps, leaning down to kiss Cas again as though the short time they had been apart had been enough for him to forget the way he tastes. Cas felt a thrill run through him as he tasted his toothpaste on Dean’s tongue, then another as Dean pushed him down gently and sat astride him on the bed. One hand found its way back up into Cas’ hair and the other held Dean up so he didn’t crush the smaller man into the mattress. Oh, but Cas wished he _would_ and a groan escaped his lips as he thought of Dean fucking into him, pressing his face into the bed and breathing hotly on the back of his neck. 

Dean pulled away with a smirk at Cas’ noise and rocked his hips, kissing down Cas’ throat and then licking his way back up to the man’s chin. The thin fabric of their pajamas did absolutely nothing to hide the fact that they were both hard in their pants and as Dean shifted slightly their erections collided and sent a bolt of sensation through both men. Cas whined and Dean let out a moan worthy of Cas’ pie-eating performance before shifting again to bring them tightly together. They rutted helplessly, lost in desire and panting into each others mouth before Dean pulled away again and divested himself of his top. Cas followed suit and pulled Dean down to him, desperate to feel their skin touching. 

It felt every bit as good as he thought it would and for a moment he couldn’t even kiss Dean, instead just pulling their chests flush together and resting his chin on Dean’s shoulder. Dean grunted and kissed his bare shoulder, fingers trailing lightly over the other as Cas ran his hands over Dean’s back. He let his weight drop onto the body underneath him and just relaxed, something he couldn’t recall ever doing in bed with someone before. It had always been an endless round of posturing, constant movement, being acutely aware of what he was doing to make sure he satisfied his partner. Dean felt content to just lie here and let Cas caress him, as if he would be perfectly willing to ignore his hard-on, roll over and curl up with Cas if that’s what he said he wanted; no pressure, no demands. 

Cas moved underneath him then, a subtle shift of his hips to remind Dean how aroused he was, and Dean responded with enthusiasm. Suddenly he felt like he wanted more, _needed_ more, and he was pulling away again, tugging at Cas’ pajama pants eagerly.

“Are you sure?” Cas asked him with a raised eyebrow and Dean only rocked in his lap and keened, momentarily beyond words. Cas shook his head, taking Dean’s hands in his and lacing their fingers together. He needed Dean to tell him what he wanted, he had already let this go too far on lust alone. “Dean, is this what you want?” 

Dean growled then and his grip on Cas’ hands tightened. “ _Yes_ , Cas, I wanna feel you,” he said thickly, “all of you.” 

That was good enough and Cas let Dean go, shedding his pants as Dean shed his own and twisting on the bed so they were lying the right way. No point in having a massive king-sized bed if you ended up only using half of it, after all. Dean covered his body again and their lips met, tender, loving kisses pressed between happy sighs as their bodies locked together neatly. Dean was an attentive lover and kissed Cas’ face all over then moved from his jaw to his throat and down to his shoulders, kissing across his clavicle and back up the other side to nibble at his earlobe. Cas moaned loudly at the attention and ran his hands over Dean’s back and down to the curve of his ass, squeezing it eagerly as Dean pressed his cock to his body, rubbing them together as though it was as natural to him as it was to Cas. 

“Want you so bad, Cas,” Dean mumbled, leaning up to kiss him tenderly and Cas smirked.

“Don’t be so eager, Dean, I’m not having sex with you on our first date,” he said slyly and Dean jerked back in surprise. 

“W-what?” He was confused; they were naked in Cas’ bed together… but no sex? Dean’s brain fizzed as he tried to comprehend the situation.

Cas rolled his hips lazily, reminding Dean he wasn’t rejecting him, and smiled. “I don’t think it’s a good idea to rush this; yesterday you thought I was female and today you want to explore the complex facets of penetrative sex with a man? Dean, I am perfectly willing to teach you… eager, even, but let yourself get used to the idea first instead of rushing in headlong.” He gave another rock of his hips and Dean gasped at the delicious friction of their hard cocks rubbing together between their bodies. 

“Right,” he agreed, just wanting more of that amazing feeling, “sure, Cas, good idea.”

They returned to their heavy petting by unspoken agreement, pre-come soon making their bellies slick with their arousal as they kissed and touched and explored each other. Dean’s moaning grew more heated, the movement of his hips erratic and desperate as he climbed towards release and Cas reached down between their bodies to take them both in hand, chasing his own orgasm with equal desperation. Dean cried out at the first touch and thrust eagerly into Cas’ fist, dropping his head to Cas’ shoulder and rubbing against him mindlessly. His breath came in ragged gasps and within a few skilful strokes he came on Cas’ stomach, his back arching as he thrust a few final times to draw out the pleasure. Cas opened his hand for long enough to release Dean and then followed him into release with a cry moments later. Dean kissed his shoulder and rolled back, lying there panting for a moment as they both came down from the euphoric high of orgasm. When he could think again he got up and padded through to the bathroom to grab some tissue and dampening a washcloth under warm water, returning quickly and helping Cas clean himself up. 

It was a touching consideration, Cas thought, having had so many lovers who were content to let him manage cleanup alone. He kept tissues in his nightstand for that very reason, but Dean had just taken the initiative without a second thought and Cas felt his heart swell with affection as Dean tossed the tissues in the wastebasket and folded the washcloth so the mess was on the inside and placed it carefully on the nightstand. 

When the cleanup was over they climbed under the covers together, Dean tentatively as if unsure if they should redress or if he was even _welcome_ in Cas’ bed after their… he didn’t know what to call the _not-_ sex they just had, but whatever it was he definitely wanted to do it again. When Cas opened his arms to Dean he snuggled in close, letting Cas hold him close and kiss his hair. He always swore he didn’t like cuddling but with Cas? It just seemed the natural thing to do. He rested his head on his lover’s shoulder and let his fingers play over the man’s skin, closing his eyes and breathing in the scent of Cas’ cologne, hair product and toothpaste now mingled with sweat and sex. 

“Thank you,” Cas said quietly, his voice heavy with sleep.

“That was awesome, I should thank you,” Dean mumbled back, tucking his nose in under Cas’ chin.

“I mean for changing your mind, being here now, not freaking out,” Cas sounded apprehensive. 

“Cas, you… you’re different to anything, any _one_ else. I think my body knew that before my brain caught up, but I think we’re on the same page now.” Dean trailed lazy kisses up Cas’ throat and squeezed his shoulder tight with his free arm. Cas squeezed him back just as fiercely and kissed his hair some more before weariness finally overcame them and they fell into a comfortable, blissful sleep. 

 

“I dunno Gabe, Dean was totally freaked out last night. He’s probably gone to play games with Charlie instead of going home ‘cause he knew you were at our place,” Sam hovered around the shorter man as they climbed the stairs to his apartment.

“No way, my baby bro is hot stuff, nobody’s ever been able to resist those eyes of his. I’m tellin’ ya, they’ll be balls deep in each other when we get in, you mark my words Sammy,” Gabriel shot back, unwrapping a hard candy and popping it in his mouth with a satisfied smack of his lips. 

“Ew, gross, so not a mental image I needed of my brother,” Sam grumbled and fell silent. 

“Relax, I’m kidding, Cassie doesn’t put out on the first date,” Gabe winked and took Sam’s hand, swinging it between them. Pulling his keys from his pocket he jingled them loudly before unlocking the door and pushing it open. “Cassieeee I’m hoooome!” Gabriel exclaimed, sauntering into the apartment then stopping dead in his tracks. Sam stepped in behind him and his jaw dropped at the sight before him.

Sitting on the couch in pajamas, watching _Michael_ of all things, were Dean and Castiel. Cas was sitting with his back to the arm rest and his legs wrapped around Dean, who was leaned back against his chest with a cup of coffee in his hands. Cas’ fingers were laced into Dean’s short hair, presumably halted in the act of carding the short brown tufts into obedience when Gabriel’s loud entrance disturbed them.

Both men looked over at their brothers standing in the doorway and Dean couldn’t help but smile at the look on Sam’s face.

“Oh look, our obnoxious brothers are here,” Dean quipped with a cheeky smirk and Cas laughed quietly, trying not to spill Dean’s coffee. 

“Oh look, one of my _students_ is in my apartment,” Gabriel shot back with an equally cheeky look and Dean blanched slightly. “Oh relax Deano, I’m not gonna fail ya for boning my kid brother, he’s old enough to look after himself.”

“I’m not boning him!” Dean said indignantly but Cas resumed his grooming and Dean relaxed almost immediately. It was impressive how quickly Cas had picked up on things that made Dean tick, his secret penchant for cuddling and his love-affair with having his hair stroked for starters. 

“Yet,” Cas said pointedly, his deep voice full of amusement. Gabriel, Sam _and_ Dean all went pink at Cas’ typical brutal honesty. 

“Alright, I’m gonna go… out somewhere,” Sam said finally, “this is just so awkward,” he gestured vaguely to where Dean had tilted his head forward and was letting Cas run his short, blunt nails down the back of his neck. 

“See ya, Sammy,” Dean called vaguely and Sam couldn’t help but smile at the contentment in his brother’s voice. Of all people, Dean deserved some happiness.

“Yeah, you guys are gross,” Gabe agreed, fleeing the room on Sam’s heels.

“Thank God that’s over,” Dean mumbled, leaning back against Cas and moving his coffee cup back to the floor to reveal the raging hard-on that his hands had been artfully concealing.

“Would have been somewhat embarrassing, yes,” Cas replied, sliding his hand down into Dean’s pajama pants and nibbling at his ear. “Now, where were we…”

**Author's Note:**

> It's remarkable how different it ended up being to what my original plan was, but I think I like this way better. I'm sorry, I just love torturing Dean and making him come to terms with his sexuality!!
> 
> I haven't actually _seen_ Michael, (it's on my list) but I Googled quotes and I'm happy with what I chose *chuckles*
> 
> I'm uploading this at 3:20am so if there's any awful inconsistencies or shitty dialogue or typos or anything then it's cause I've been working on this shit for hours and I'm shattered but I just so wanted to upload it today (and even then it's already tomorrow!) so yeah, feel free to (politely) point out any mistakes or anything to me! <3 Oh, and let me know if I'm missing any tags I should have included cause for the fucking life of me I can't think of shit right now.
> 
> Edit: Ahaha, laughing hysterically at some of my errors "arm against the back rest" holy fuck Ehryn. Fixed a few mistakes, anyone spots any more shout 'em out <3
> 
> Edit2: Ohhh so many errors. Just fixing some more!
> 
> Edit3: Holy moly guys, thank you so much for the amazing response! I love all the comments and the kudos make me all warm and fuzzy, you are all amazing, thank you I can't even tell you <3 I am loving the hilarious fact that the one fic I wrote that gets interest on Tumblr is the one I didn't bother to put my url on, c'est la vie! Still, just knowing people are enjoying it means so much to me and spurs me to write more. Thank you, thank you so much, this has made my day. (You can now find me on Tumblr! On my [main blog](http://faeryn.tumblr.com) or my [very quiet writing sideblog.](http://faerynfics.tumblr.com))


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